Rahul Pathak's Profile27165 Members viewed this Profile

Last Seen on : 2-Jul-2016
Member Since : 3-Oct-2015
Welcome to my profile page. I'm Rahul Pathak From Azamgarh, India. Currently I'm doing my job. Along with that i'm also using all the services of Uminto.com in my free time and its awesome. There are so many things to learn in Uminto.com. My area of Specialization is Other. I used to play games and hourly quizzes daily on Uminto.com.
Basic Information:
Date of Birth : Tuesday, August 15, 1995 (20 Years)
Gender : Male
Contact Information:
Mobile Number : 88######21
Email Address : ad••••••••@•••••••.com
Location : Azamgarh, India
Pincode : 276001

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Quiz Played : 90
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Movie Review Posted : 110
Jupiter Money Level : 21
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Umnito Flip Score : 400

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Updated on Saturday, October 3, 2015  |  1:14:35 PM
Updated on Tuesday, October 27, 2015  |  7:20:22 AM
Updated on Tuesday, January 12, 2016  |  1:34:25 PM

Movie Reviews Posted By Rahul Pathak

Ki & Ka
(According to Rahul Pathak Ki & Ka is a 0 star movie)
ki & ka is an indian romantic comedy-drama film written, directed, and produced by r. balki. the film follows a young, married couple whose relationship challenges the gender roles placed upon women and men in indian society. it stars kareena kapoor and arjun kapoor. it was written by r. balki . its a good movie .
View all reviews on Ki & Ka

Review Posted on : 28 Apr 2016
Killing Veerappan
(According to Rahul Pathak Killing Veerappan is a 3 star movie)
killing veerappan is indian, docudrama thriller film that was written and directed by ram gopal varma and based on the events leading to operation cocoon to capture or kill indian bandit veerappan. its a good movie made by ram gopal verma . i like the story of this movie .
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Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
(According to Rahul Pathak Star Wars: The Force Awakens is a 5 star movie)
star wars: the force awakens is an american epic space opera film that was directed, co-produced, and co-written by j. j. abrams . it stars is harrison ford, mark hamill, carrie fisher, adam driver, daisy ridley, john boyega, oscar isaac, lupita nyong'o, andy serkis, domhnall gleeson, anthony daniels, peter mayhew, and max von sydow everyone do a great job . the story is set approximately 30 years after the events of eturn of the jedi. i give it 5/5 ratings . it is watchable movie .
View all reviews on Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Bajirao Mastani
(According to Rahul Pathak Bajirao Mastani is a 5 star movie)
bajirao mastani is an indian historical romance film that was produced and directed by sanjay leela bhansali . the film narrates the story of the the maratha warrior baji rao i . the stars ranveer singh and deepika padukone portray the titular protagonists, and priyanka chopra plays bajirao's first wife kashibai . this movie is too good .
View all reviews on Bajirao Mastani

Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Dilwale
(According to Rahul Pathak Dilwale is a 5 star movie)
superhit movie . dilwale is 2015 indian romantic action comedy film that was directed by rohit shetty, and produced by gauri khan . the stars of this film is shah rukh khan, kajol, varun dhawan and kriti sanon in lead roles. i give it 5/5 ratings based on story .
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Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Hate Story 3
(According to Rahul Pathak Hate Story 3 is a 5 star movie)
hate story 3 is a good thriller film . hate story 3 is directed by vishal pandya . who do a great work in this film . the stars of this movie is sharman joshi, zarine khan, karan singh grover, daisy shah . i think you may go and watch this movie .
View all reviews on Hate Story 3

Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Angry Indian Goddesses
(According to Rahul Pathak Angry Indian Goddesses is a 2 star movie)
angry indian goddesses is a time pass movie angry indian goddesses is directed by pan nalin with sandhya mridul and tannishtha chatterjee, sarah-jane dias, anushka manchanda, amrit maghera, rajshri deshpande . the pavleen gujral playing lead roles with adil hussain . i give 2/5 ratings to this movie .
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Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Tamasha
(According to Rahul Pathak Tamasha is a 5 star movie)
tamasha is indian romantic drama film directed by imtiaz ali and produced by sajid nadiadwala. it stars ranbir kapoor and deepika padukone in lead roles. tamasha tells the story of character ved . you go and watch this movie . in this movie the stars roles are very fabulous .
View all reviews on Tamasha

Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Victor Frankenstein
(According to Rahul Pathak Victor Frankenstein is a 4 star movie)
victor frankenstein is good movie . i think u may go to watch this movie . victor frankenstein is an american horror film based . the stars of this movie is daniel radcliffe, james mcavoy, jessica brown findlay, andrew scott, charles dance . everyone do god work in this movie .
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Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
The Hunger Games 2
(According to Rahul Pathak The Hunger Games 2 is a 4 star movie)
its very good movie and watchable . in this movie as the war of panem escalates to the destruction of other districts by the capitol, katniss everdeen, the reluctant leader of the rebellion, must bring together an army against president snow . u go and watch for one time it.
View all reviews on The Hunger Games 2

Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Spectre
(According to Rahul Pathak Spectre is a 4 star movie)
it is a very nice movie . spectre will be the twenty-fourth james bond film . it will feature daniel craig in his fourth performance as james bond, and christoph waltz as franz oberhauser, the film's antagonist. it was directed by sam mendes as his second james bond film following . the story features james bond's first encounter with the global criminal agency known as spectre . i give 4/5 ratings.
View all reviews on Spectre

Review Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
Prem Ratan Dhan Payo
(According to Rahul Pathak Prem Ratan Dhan Payo is a 4 star movie)
prem ratan dhan payo is a awasome movie . this is a very good family film and i think you may go to watch this movie . the director of this movie is sooraj r. barjatya and the stars of this movie is salman khan, sonam kapoor, neil nitin mukesh, anupam kher . some good actions . every stars of this film do a great work.
View all reviews on Prem Ratan Dhan Payo

Review Posted on : 15 Nov 2015
Yaara Silly Silly
(According to Rahul Pathak Yaara Silly Silly is a 2 star movie)
yaara silly silly is a romantic film .which is directed by subhash sehgal who try to do their best in this film . in this film there is a portrays mature relationship between a prostitute and her customer . i give rating 2 out of 5 . i think you don't go to watch this movie .
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Review Posted on : 7 Nov 2015
Four Pillars Of Basement
(According to Rahul Pathak Four Pillars Of Basement is a 1 star movie)
this movie is very bad . nothing is there and i think you don't waste your time or money towards this film . the ditector of this film is giresh naik . it is a bakwas type of movie . i am give rating 1 out of 5 .
View all reviews on Four Pillars Of Basement

Review Posted on : 7 Nov 2015
Ranbanka
(According to Rahul Pathak Ranbanka is a 2 star movie)
ranbanka is an action movie . in this movie manish paul in an action avatar for the first time along with ravi kishan in a pivotal role which very intresting . this movie have no attractive story but work of every starts of this film is faboulous .
View all reviews on Ranbanka

Review Posted on : 7 Nov 2015
Charlie Kay Chakkar Mein
(According to Rahul Pathak Charlie Kay Chakkar Mein is a 3 star movie)
charlie kay chakkar mein is a bollywood movie directed by manish srivastav. it is a good movie no doubt . the stars of this likenaseeruddin shah, anand tiwari, manasi rachh, subrat dutta, disha arora, auroshikha dey, amit sial, siraj mustafa e.t.c do a very good job . it is one time watchable movie .
View all reviews on Charlie Kay Chakkar Mein

Review Posted on : 7 Nov 2015
Once Upon A Time In Bihar
(According to Rahul Pathak Once Upon A Time In Bihar is a 4 star movie)
this movie is a state level movie which is very good and i think movie is based on real incidents, set in the year 2003 - 2004 in ravenous terrains of buxar district of bihar. the director of this movie nitin chandra who do thier best . every star of this movie is do well . i think you may go to watch at one time.
View all reviews on Once Upon A Time In Bihar

Review Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
Main Aur Charles
(According to Rahul Pathak Main Aur Charles is a 3 star movie)
mai aur charles is the bollywood movie which is base on true story. a great step taken by prawaal raman to direct this film. it is a realy good movie with a lot of actions . i think this movie not go for big hit because india have own features that those movie which is based on true story not go for big hit . i think you must watch this movie .
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Review Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
Shaandaar
(According to Rahul Pathak Shaandaar is a 4 star movie)
this movie is very good. in this movies shahid kapoor’s father pankaj kapoor, who plays the role of alia’s father. the chemistry between alia and shahid is very good. shahid kapoor falls in love with aliya bhatt. shaandaar is the movie that have everything. aliya bhatt do well.
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Review Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
Pyar Ka Punchnama 2
(According to Rahul Pathak Pyar Ka Punchnama 2 is a 4 star movie)
pyaar ka punchnama 2 is 2015 hindi film. it is sequel to 2011 hit film pyaar ka punchnama. the sequel is directed by luv ranjan and produced by viacom 18 motion.it was a very lovely film and i think both the three actor do a great combination of comedy with their girls.
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Review Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
Ekkees Toppon Ki Salaami
(According to Rahul Pathak Ekkees Toppon Ki Salaami is a 5 star movie)
ekkees toppon ki salaami is hindi bollywood film . it has been produced by anurradha prasad and abhinav shukla under the banner of nautanki films. and it was directed by ravindra gautam . i think it is good movie and enjoyabl e till t h e e n d .
View all reviews on Ekkees Toppon Ki Salaami

Review Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
Jigariyaa
(According to Rahul Pathak Jigariyaa is a 5 star movie)
it was a good romantic movie which is directed by rajpurohit . this movie made on inspired from the true events, 'jigariyaa' tells the tale of shaamlal gupta (shaamu) and radhika sharma (raadha). i think it was good for loverers and very quite enjoyable m o v i e .
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Review Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
Happy New Year
(According to Rahul Pathak Happy New Year is a 5 star movie)
its was lovely film in which shahrukh play a major role and their team do a great perfprmance to won the dancing . a very fine theafing of diamond at the ending of the movie. great comedy scenes and song and also great action done by shahrakuh khan . it is a very excellent movie .
View all reviews on Happy New Year

Review Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
Chinar Daastaan-E-Ishq
(According to Rahul Pathak Chinar Daastaan-E-Ishq is a 4 star movie)
this is a realy excellent movies. it is based on the two lovers who lover each other deeply. in this film the scene of kashmir was extramily very beautiful . over all performance of the movi is very good . i see and enjoy the whole action and romentic scenes .
View all reviews on Chinar Daastaan-E-Ishq

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Mission: Impossible €� Rogue Nation
(According to Rahul Pathak Mission: Impossible €� Rogue Nation is a 5 star movie)
this is a great movies of hollywood and every one love to watch this movies .mission impossible is an american action spy film written and directed by christopher mcquarrie. it is the fifth installment in the mission: impossible series and was preceded by mission: impossible – ghost protocol . it stars tom cruise, who reprises his role of imf agent ethan hunt.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Abcd 2
(According to Rahul Pathak Abcd 2 is a 4 star movie)
any body can dance 2 is indian dance film, directed by remo d'souza . it is the sequel to as the 2013's any body can dance. it stars varun dhawan , shraddha kapoor and prabhu deva in lead roles with lauren gottlieb, raghav juyal and dharmesh yelande in supporting roles. prabhu dheva will be seen in a negative role in this film. abcd 2 based on a true story . dances arew extreamily nice and memoriable it is a awasom movie and also this is full of entertain movie.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Action Jackson
(According to Rahul Pathak Action Jackson is a 5 star movie)
i think never this type of film made in future . it is excelient action and comedy film . action jackson is indian action comedy movie. which is directed by prabhudeva and produced by gordhan tanwani and sunil lulla. this movie features ajay devgan in the title role, alongside sonakshi sinha, yami gautam and manasvi mamgai as the female leads and anand raj, portraying the main antagonist.
View all reviews on Action Jackson

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Solid Patels
(According to Rahul Pathak Solid Patels is a 3 star movie)
it it a time pass movie and enjoyable movie . tom patel and jerry patel. these patel boys are no less than real life animated characters themselves is very good . they live together in a rented apartment in mumbai, and have no specific jobs . i think u may like this .
View all reviews on Solid Patels

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Dum Laga Ke Haisha
(According to Rahul Pathak Dum Laga Ke Haisha is a 5 star movie)
brave film of bollywood . its script was excellent dum laga ke haisha is bollywood drama film directed by sharat katariya and starring ayushmann khurrana and bhumi pednekar in lead roles featuring kumar sanu in a cameo. the filming took place in haridwar and rishikesh. it is a very good movie and memoriable too.
View all reviews on Dum Laga Ke Haisha

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Titoo Mba
(According to Rahul Pathak Titoo Mba is a 4 star movie)
titoo mba is a light-hearted comedy movie a brief emotional roller coaster ride.titoo is an ambitious chandigarh boy who dreams of becoming a big businessman. however fate doesn't favor titoo and he faces heavy losses in business. in order to repay the loans taken from his neighbors titoo is forced to do something extremely bizarre to earn money. it is a good comedy indian film and action is also good.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Phir Se...
(According to Rahul Pathak Phir Se... is a 3 star movie)
kunal kohli do their debut as a actor in this film .phir se is indian bollywood film directed by kunal kohli and ajay bhuyan. the film stars kunal kohli and jennifer winget and deals with a husband-wife relationship. rajit kapoor, dalip tahil, kanwaljeet singh and sushmita mukherjee portray supporting roles. it is a good movie this is the first film of the director kunal kohli as a actor and also the debut film of jennifer winget in bollywood .
View all reviews on Phir Se...

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Phantom
(According to Rahul Pathak Phantom is a 4 star movie)
phantom is indian political thriller film directed by kabir khan, and produced by sajid nadiadwala. it stars saif ali khan and katrina kaif in lead roles. the film is about the post-26/11 attacks in mumbai and global terrorism. their os a great action and thriller. saif ali khan was like a sharp shooter and he look great to do his work.
View all reviews on Phantom

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Liar'S Dice
(According to Rahul Pathak Liar'S Dice is a 3 star movie)
liar's dice is a hindi bollywood movie. which is written and directed by geetu mohandas. the stars of this movie is geetanjali thapa and nawazuddin siddiqui in lead roles. this movie deals with the issue of the human cost of migration to cities and the issue of migrant labourers and their exploitation, through the story of young mother, living in remote village, whose husband goes missing after having left to work many months ago . it is a very good movie and i want to say that every one mucst watch this.
View all reviews on Liar'S Dice

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Mumbai 125 Km 3D
(According to Rahul Pathak Mumbai 125 Km 3D is a 3 star movie)
mumbai 125 km 3d is indian horror movie. which is directed by hemant madhukar and starring karanvir bohra, veena malik, vedita pratap singh, joey debroy, vije bhatia. mani sharma the movie star with a very local horror scene when a drunken person drive on road and hit a girl,,,,,, then the girl dead .real horror and action was great of this movie.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Sonali Cable
(According to Rahul Pathak Sonali Cable is a 1 star movie)
sonali cable is a bakwas type of the bollywood movie . which is directed by charudutt acharya and produced by ramesh sippy and rohan sippy . the script , penned by acharya himself . i think no one to think to watch after one time watching of this movie .
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Mumbai Delhi Mumbai
(According to Rahul Pathak Mumbai Delhi Mumbai is a 4 star movie)
mumbai delhi mumbai is an indian bollywood movie and directed by satish rajwade . the movie , adapted from rajwade ' s 2011 mumbai-pune-mumbai , the stars shiv pandit do well better . it is based one romance. the comedy of this movie was very good and watchable .
View all reviews on Mumbai Delhi Mumbai

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Balwinder Singh Famous Ho Gaya
(According to Rahul Pathak Balwinder Singh Famous Ho Gaya is a 4 star movie)
it was directed by sunil agnihotri and produced by sunil agnihotri . this movie is mika singh's first attempt as an actor . milkha singh do good in his first attampt and it is very necessory for his carrier. i think it was a good movie. the comedy part are also very good and enjoyable.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Haider
(According to Rahul Pathak Haider is a 5 star movie)
it is indian drametic movie which is directed by vishal bhardwaj . it is a modern-day adaptation of william shakespeare's hamlet, set in kashmir. this movie stars shahid kapoor as haider, and tabu essays the role of his mother who marries her brother-in-law after her husband mysteriously disappears. stars shraddha kapoor is loking great in this movie.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Meinu Ek Ladki Chaahiye
(According to Rahul Pathak Meinu Ek Ladki Chaahiye is a 3 star movie)
this movie is totally time pass but at the some places this turn my mind and do great work. this movie is a enjoyable . when i this it got some missing thing but it was a good work done by the stars. the stars are puru chibber, raghuvir yadav, reecha sinha and zakir hussain.
View all reviews on Meinu Ek Ladki Chaahiye

Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Shamitabh
(According to Rahul Pathak Shamitabh is a 4 star movie)
it was directed by r. balki . the film features amitabh bachchan, dhanush and akshara haasan, in her debut, in the lead roles. this is a story that celebrates teamwork, friendship and big dreams. shamitabh is a film about the birth of a big star and the smoke screen that was created to fulfil a dream.it is an average but due to amitab bacchan it gave 4/5.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Jai Jawaan Jai Kisaan
(According to Rahul Pathak Jai Jawaan Jai Kisaan is a 4 star movie)
jai jawan jai kisan (english: hail the soldier, hail the farmer) was a slogan given to india by the prime minister of india lal bahadur shastri in 1965 at a public gathering at ramlila maidan, delhi. it means hail the soldier and hail the farmer.[1][2] soon after shastri took over the prime ministership of india after nehru's death, india was attacked by pakistan. at the same time there was scarcity of foodgrains in country. must watch it is a good movie and loveable.
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Review Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
Dirty Politics
(According to Rahul Pathak Dirty Politics is a 3 star movie)
dirty politics is an upcoming indian drama film written and directed by k.c. bokadia. the film stars mallika sherawat, jackie shroff, ashutosh rana, anupam kher , om puri and naseeruddin shah. it is not a good movie but i think every one watch this for taking some knowledge purpose .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Roy
(According to Rahul Pathak Roy is a 4 star movie)
roy is a movie about the love triangle revolving around the lives of a filmmaker, a thief and their mutual love interest. roy movie is a romantic thriller.it would be good to see jacqueline fernandez in a double role. it is movie masala and best for those who love fighting and action many action are present in this film and they are very good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Badlapur
(According to Rahul Pathak Badlapur is a 5 star movie)
badlapur is blockbuster film of the year and it was directed by sriram raghavan. the film stars varun dhawan and nawazuddin siddiqui in lead roles, with huma qureshi, yami gautam, divya dutta and radhika apte in supporting roles. the film is scheduled for release on 20 february 2015. raghav a.k.a raghu is a man with a past he witnessed his wife and son being killed during a robbery. 15 years later, raghu finds out who pulled the trigger to kill his family. it is a good but some times i feel it not good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Qissa
(According to Rahul Pathak Qissa is a 4 star movie)
qissa is a 2013 indian-german drama film written and directed by anup singh. it was screened in the contemporary world cinema section at the 2013 toronto international film festival where it won the netpac award for world or international asian film. this film is a remarkable and enjoyable. every one muct watch this movie.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Badmashiyaan - Fun Never Ends
(According to Rahul Pathak Badmashiyaan - Fun Never Ends is a 4 star movie)
badmashiyaan is romantic indian film. caf owner dev's girlfriend na-ri left him the night he meant to propose to her. months later, he meets palak, a young woman living next door, during a bank hold-up. dev's friend pinkesh, a private investigator, has been trying to track down na-ri for him. he finds that she is living with don jassi, a reformed gangster. comedy is very good and action aslo good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Luckhnowi Ishq
(According to Rahul Pathak Luckhnowi Ishq is a 4 star movie)
in this movie fever of love and romance grips karishma kotak and adhyayan suman as soon they will be shooting soon in lucknow for a movie called lucknowi ishq- an eternal love story. the source from the movie shared, lucknowi ishq movie will entirely be canned in beautiful city of lucknow, while some parts can be shot in mumbai studios only. the shooting will go on till the month end. it is a good movies and watchable,
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Nh10
(According to Rahul Pathak Nh10 is a 4 star movie)
nh10 is an indian thriller film directed by navdeep singh. it stars anushka sharma and neil bhoopalam in lead roles, and marks the production debut of sharma. the film is co-produced by phantom films. it tells the story of a young couple whose road trip goes awry after an encounter with a group of violent criminals. it is a blockbuster film and i want to see more times . it is a good movie
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Dilliwali Zaalim Girlfriend
(According to Rahul Pathak Dilliwali Zaalim Girlfriend is a 3 star movie)
hi fiends i had just seen the movie and must say great movie but something was missing in the movie dilliwaali zaalim girlfriend is bollywood romance comedy film directed by japinder kaur and produced by tarnpreet singh and manjeet kaur under jap films. the film features divyendu sharma, jackie shroff, prachi mishra and ira dubey in lead roles. it is an intresing movie of the year.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Coffee Bloom
(According to Rahul Pathak Coffee Bloom is a 3 star movie)
great indian romantic film . what a work of art impressingly. coffee bloom is indian romantic drama film directed by debutant director manu warrier. it stars arjun mathur and sugandha garg in lead roles. the film is produced by speaking tree productions. it tells the story of a young man dev, who sells his family coffee estate as a statement underlining his renunciation of the world. the film premiered at mumbai film festival, organized by mumbai
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Happy Ending
(According to Rahul Pathak Happy Ending is a 4 star movie)
happy ending is a romantick movie. which is directed by raj nidimoru and krishna d.k. and this movie produced by illuminati films. the movie stars govinda, saif ali khan, ileana d'cruz, ranvir shorey and kalki koechlin in pivotal roles. kareena kapoor khan and preity zinta also feature in cameos it sis a fabulous movie and a family fillm .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Pk
(According to Rahul Pathak Pk is a 5 star movie)
pk movie will be a political satire, hitting out at corruption in the country. aamir khan will play an alcoholic social crusader in this movie. in this movie an innocent alien come on earth and he lost his stone and he try to finding by seaching god in every where in the world.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Rang Rasiya
(According to Rahul Pathak Rang Rasiya is a 2 star movie)
rang rasiya is an indian comedy movie which is based on the life of the 19th-century indian painter raja ravi varma. this movie is directed by ketan mehta, produced by deepa sahi and aanand mahendroo. it stars nandana sen,randeep hooda and a newcomer triptha parashar in the lead role . rang rasiya is a great impact for two lovers anf its was a beautiful film.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Main Aur Mr. Riight
(According to Rahul Pathak Main Aur Mr. Riight is a 2 star movie)
hi fiends i had just seen the movie and must say great movie but something was missing in the movie . if you like masala movies than it is a perfact one . i watched it not a good but not very bad it is a awasom movies .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Dolly Ki Doli
(According to Rahul Pathak Dolly Ki Doli is a 4 star movie)
dolly ki doli is hindi romantic comedy movie. which is directed by debutant abhishek dogra and produced by actor arbaaz khan under his production house arbaaz khan productions. this movie stars sonam kapoor in the title role and also features pulkit samrat, rajkummar rao and varun sharma. this movie is excelent romance and a good family film .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Hawaizaada
(According to Rahul Pathak Hawaizaada is a 4 star movie)
hawaaizaada is hindi movie. which is directed by vibhu puri. this movie stars ayushmann khurrana, mithun chakraborty and pallavi sharda in pivotal roles. this movie is based on the life of scientist shivkar bapuji talpade who is said to have invented a flying machine ring the end of 19th century. currently there is very less proofs to prove that the flight took place. good action and ending is realy awasom.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Ungli
(According to Rahul Pathak Ungli is a 4 star movie)
ungli is a bollywood comedy movie. which is written and directed by rensil d'silva and this movie produced by karan johar and hiroo yash johar. this movie features an ensemble cast including sanjay dutt,kangana ranaut,emraan hashmi,randeep hooda, neil bhoopalam, angad bedi. being delayed for over a year, it is a very good movie.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Alone
(According to Rahul Pathak Alone is a 3 star movie)
alone is indian horror movie starring bipasha basu, karan singh grover and sagar saikia in pivotal roles. it marks this movie debut of grover. this movie is directed by bhushan patel . it is a remake of thai movie alone, which is made in kannada and tamil in 2012. this movie create suspence many times.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Titli
(According to Rahul Pathak Titli is a 4 star movie)
i like this movie because the story is very interesting .titli centres on a young man and his desperation to escape from his environment. it is directed by kanu behl and produced by aditya chopra under the banner of yash raj films. the star of this movie is shashank arora, shivani raghuvanshi, ranvir shorey, amit sial, lalit behl, and prashant singh in the lead roles.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Baby
(According to Rahul Pathak Baby is a 4 star movie)
baby is indian espionage action thriller movie. which is directed by neeraj pandey. this movie stars akshay kumar, rana daggubati, anupam kher, danny denzongpa taapsee pannu and madhurima tuli . akshay kumaralways do great in his every film. at middle part of this movie is very intresting but at last not good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Hunterrr
(According to Rahul Pathak Hunterrr is a 2 star movie)
this movie was enjoyable and not good for everyone. i think this type of movie govern or permited but its comedy eas realy very good some action are also good it was directed by harshavardhan kulkarni. funny movie and awasom comedy . the movie name is which is fabulous .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Barkhaa
(According to Rahul Pathak Barkhaa is a 3 star movie)
this movie is watchable and quite good movie from my view. i think this film is best for lovers not gor singler. this filmwas directed by shadaab mirza and produced by shabana hashmi. it stars sara loren in lead titular role. the film also stars taaha shah, shweta pandit, priyanshu chatterjee and puneet issar in prominent roles.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Kill Dil
(According to Rahul Pathak Kill Dil is a 4 star movie)
kill dill is hindi romantic action movie which is directed by shaad ali and produced by aditya chopra going to under the banner of yash raj films. the film will star ranveer singh,govinda,parineeti chopra and ali zafar in the lead roles. govinda is playing negative role in this movie. it was a awasom movie. everyone must watch.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Roar
(According to Rahul Pathak Roar is a 4 star movie)
what a movie its was a full of fear . this movie is good and also actions are also good . some time i fear for little aa moment . sound casting is very nice. roar is a bollywood movie which is directed byit is very good movie.every one would enjoying this movie.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
A Decent Arrangement
(According to Rahul Pathak A Decent Arrangement is a 3 star movie)
a decent arrangement is a contemporary dramatic that explores the complexities of ethnic identity and the choices brought about by the ashok khosla, an aimless indian-american copywriter, travels to india seeking an arranged marriage and with it an opportunity for emotional simplicity. after watching rhis movie i expext it not get big hit but some funniest things are not easily forgetable.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Super Nani
(According to Rahul Pathak Super Nani is a 4 star movie)
super nani is a bollywood movie and directed and produced by indra kumar. super nani is the story of rekha (who behave as the name of bharti bhatia). whose every waking hour is devoted to looking after the smallest need and praying for the betterment of her family comprising of her family. a good comedy film. i think at begning to end it was prefect a movie.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Chaarfutiya Chhokare
(According to Rahul Pathak Chaarfutiya Chhokare is a 4 star movie)
chaarfutiya chhokare is bollywood hindi social thriller movie .which is directed by manish harishankar and produced by sunill khosla & vibha dutta khosla. this movie is based on the subject of child-trafficking. a brillient thriller movie that just not makes your hearts out but makes you think as the movie proceeds.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Bangistan
(According to Rahul Pathak Bangistan is a 4 star movie)
bangistan is 2015 bollywood comedy satire film directed by karan anshuman and produced by farhan akhtar and ritesh sidhwani starring riteish deshmukh, pulkit samrat and chandan roy sanyal in lead roles. jacqueline fernandez will appear in a cameo. the film is verry funny and u much like when u see .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Drishyam
(According to Rahul Pathak Drishyam is a 4 star movie)
drishyam is 2015 indian thriller drama film directed by nishikant kamat. it features ajay devgn, shriya saran and tabu in the lead roles, and produced by kumar mangat pathak, ajit andhare and abhishek pathak. the film is a remake of the malayalam film of the same name, directed by jeethu joseph with mohanlal and meena in the lead. when the trailer of the film wasgood then the film is also good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Brothers
(According to Rahul Pathak Brothers is a 5 star movie)
brothers is indian action-drama film, directed by karan malhotra and produced by dharma productions, lionsgate films and endemol india the film is an official remake of the 2011 hollywood film warrior.the film tells the story of a broken family, set in the world of mixed martial arts and underground street fighting. it stars akshay kumar do great action and fightin ie awasom.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Manjhi - The Mountain Man
(According to Rahul Pathak Manjhi - The Mountain Man is a 5 star movie)
manjhi - the mountain man is indian biographical film, based on the life of dashrath manjhi, widely known as the "mountain man" was a poor labourer in gehlaur village, near gaya in bihar, india, who carved a path through a mountain using only a hammer and chisel. the film is directed by ketan mehta, jointly produced by viacom 18 motion pictures and nfdc india. nawazuddin siddiqui enacted the role of dashrath manjhi, while radhika apte played manjhi's wife. execellent film of bollywood in 2015.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
All Is Well
(According to Rahul Pathak All Is Well is a 5 star movie)
all is well is bollywood family drama film directed by umesh shukla and produced by bhushan kumar, krishan kumar, shyam bajaj and varun bajaj and co-produced by ajay kapoor. it stars abhishek bachchan, rishi kapoor, asin and supriya pathak in lead roles.the film tackles a thorny issue with a social message similar to shukla's previous venture omg – oh my god!.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Welcome Back
(According to Rahul Pathak Welcome Back is a 4 star movie)
welcome back is indian comedy film directed by anees bazmee, and produced by firoz nadiadwala and co-produced by f m khan swiss entertainment. it is a sequel to the 2007 film welcome, featuring an ensemble cast that includes nana patekar, anil kapoor and paresh rawal reprising their roles from the prequel. john abraham and shruti haasan are new additions to the lead cast. waht a great comedy but the old welcome is better than wlcom back.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Hero
(According to Rahul Pathak Hero is a 4 star movie)
hero is indian romantic action film directed by nikhil advani and co-written with umesh bist, a remake of subhash ghai's directed 1983 film of the same name, which starred jackie shroff. this is the first films for sooraj pancholi, son of aditya pancholi, and for athiya shetty, the daughter of suniel shetty. movie is not very good but the sone mai tera hero is very good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Welcome To Karachi
(According to Rahul Pathak Welcome To Karachi is a 3 star movie)
welcome to karachi is indian film directed by ashish r mohan and produced by vashu bhagnani and uzair junejo . the film stars arshad warsi and jackky bhagnani as pivotal leads. it is a remake of the 1994 english film dumb and dumber starring jim carrey and jeff daniels. the film is a political satire about two indians who land in karachi, pakistan without their passports. no sooner do they get trapped in web of the taliban and try to find a way to get back to india
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Piku
(According to Rahul Pathak Piku is a 3 star movie)
piku is indian comedy-drama film directed by shoojit sircar. it stars amitabh bachchan and deepika padukone in lead roles and deals with a father-daughter relationship. irrfan khan, moushumi chatterjee and jishu sengupta portray supporting roles. piku is not bad soo. it was good movie. bachchan ji do well his role at thier age.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Dharam Sankat Mein
(According to Rahul Pathak Dharam Sankat Mein is a 5 star movie)
dharam sankat mein is 2015 indian comedy film directed by fuwad khan. the film is produced by sajjad chunawala and shariq patel under the banners viacom 18 motion pictures . it is very funny movie. paresh rawal do great comedy sometime action was also good . it was a lovely movie.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Margarita With A Straw
(According to Rahul Pathak Margarita With A Straw is a 4 star movie)
margarita with a straw, previously known as choone chali aasman in the indian market & margarita with a straw in the international market is a 2015 indian film directed by shonali bose, starring kalki koechlin. kalki plays a girl with cerebral palsy. the movie talks about her struggle with the normal activities in her life. margarita, with a straw is one of the five projects selected for the work in progress lab.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Mr. X
(According to Rahul Pathak Mr. X is a 5 star movie)
mr. x is good film. mr. x appear in only light. he caugt in chemicat accident.mr. x is indian 3d thriller film directed vikram bhatt and written by shagufta rafique, while mukesh bhatt is producing the film. the film stars emraan hashmi and amyra dastur, and is a story of how a man gets invisibility powers, and becomes a vigilante to take on revenge from people who have wronged him
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Bezubaan Ishq
(According to Rahul Pathak Bezubaan Ishq is a 4 star movie)
bezubaan ishq is 2015 bollywood romantic film directed by jashwant gangani and produced by c.j. gadara and dinesh likhiya. the film stars mugdha godse, sneha ullal and nishant in leads roles. music directors babli haque and rupesh verma, will be composing the music for the film. romance goes to peak level but movie is very good.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Gabbar Is Back
(According to Rahul Pathak Gabbar Is Back is a 5 star movie)
gabbar is back (previously titled main gabbar) is hindi action drama film directed by krish and produced by sanjay leela bhansali and viacom 18 motion pictures. featuring akshay kumar in the title role, the film is a remake of 2002 tamil film ramanaa. my comendment is that every indian do their own work and know his or her power nothing is impossible.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Kuch Kuch Locha Hai
(According to Rahul Pathak Kuch Kuch Locha Hai is a 4 star movie)
kuch kuch locha hai, previously titled patel rap is bollywood comedy movie directed by devang dholakia starring sunny leone, ram kapoor, evelyn sharma and navdeep chabbra in lead roles. the film is presented by magic pictures and entertainment pvt ltd. asha jhaveri is the associate producer of the film. described as a sexy comedy, navdeep chabbra will debut with this film and will play the son of kapoor. it very funny film . every one who love comedy must watch.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Bombay Velvet
(According to Rahul Pathak Bombay Velvet is a 4 star movie)
bombay velvet is indian crime drama film directed and co-produced by anurag kashyap, based on historian gyan prakash's book mumbai fables. set in bombay of the 1960s, the film tells the story of a boxer, johnny balraj, and an aspiring jazz singer, rosie, and how their hopes and dreams collide with their individual realities. it stars ranbir kapoor, anushka sharma and karan johar in lead roles with kay kay menon, manish choudhary, vivaan shah and siddharth basu appearing in supporting roles. every stars of this film do gerat performance as the director want.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Ishq Ke Parindey
(According to Rahul Pathak Ishq Ke Parindey is a 4 star movie)
ishq ke parindey - love surpasses all borders is an upcoming hindi film starring rishi verma and priyanka mehta. this movie portrays inda-pak conflict against the backdrop of a powerful love story. the film strongly sends out the message of peace for the constantly warring neighbouring countries – india and pakistan. i thing it was a good but learnable movies.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Ek Paheli Leela
(According to Rahul Pathak Ek Paheli Leela is a 4 star movie)
ek paheli leela is 2015 bollywood musical thriller film, written & directed by bobby khan and produced by bhushan kumar and krishan kumar. it stars sunny leone in the titular lead role with jay bhanushali, rajneesh duggal, jas arora, mohit ahlawat and rahul dev in pivotal roles. choreography is done by saroj khan and ahmed khan. music for the film is composed by amaal mallik. t-series has acquired the music rights of the film. principal photography of the film began in jodhpur which is very nice place.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Tanu Weds Manu Returns
(According to Rahul Pathak Tanu Weds Manu Returns is a 4 star movie)
tanu weds manu eturns is hindi romantic comedy film directed by anand l. rai. the film is a sequel to tanu weds manu (2011), in which stars kangana ranaut and r. madhavan reprise their roles from the original. ranaut also portrays the additional role of a haryanvi athlete in the film. kangana ranaut do great acting which was intrestingly.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
I Love Desi
(According to Rahul Pathak I Love Desi is a 3 star movie)
i love desi is hindi romantic comedy film directed by pankaj batra. producer rocky daswani is introducing vedant bali who is manager to akhshay kumar and priyanka shah. gulshan grover, shakti anand, krip suri and gurpreet ghuggi are also starring in the film. the film has been shot in canada, thailand and india. film star akshay kumar has helped his manager during the making of the film.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Dil Dhadakne Do
(According to Rahul Pathak Dil Dhadakne Do is a 4 star movie)
dil dhadakne do is indian comedy-drama film directed by zoya akhtar and produced by ritesh sidhwani and farhan akhtar. the film features an ensemble cast of anil kapoor, shefali shah, priyanka chopra, ranveer singh, anushka sharma and farhan akhtar and tells the story of a dysfunctional punjabi family on a cruise trip. it ia awasom movies and good acting.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Jurassic World
(According to Rahul Pathak Jurassic World is a 4 star movie)
jurassic world is a 2015 american science fiction adventure film directed by colin trevorrow. it is the fourth installment in the jurassic park film series. for those whose childhood memories are peppered with the awe-inspiring and sometimes frightening images of humongous dinosaurs . this move realy dangerous . action is good .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Hamari Adhuri Kahani
(According to Rahul Pathak Hamari Adhuri Kahani is a 5 star movie)
really this is a heart touching movie with starring vidya balan and ihamari adhuri kahani is indian romantic drama film, directed by mohit suri and produced by mahesh bhatt under the banner vishesh films and fox star studios.the film stars emraan hashmi, vidya balan and rajkummar rao imran hasmi.the story of this film is good and nice loveable . script was too good
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Detective Byomkesh Bakshy!
(According to Rahul Pathak Detective Byomkesh Bakshy! is a 4 star movie)
detective byomkesh bakshy! is indian crime thriller film directed by dibakar banerjee and produced by banerjee and aditya chopra. the film is based on the fictional detective byomkesh bakshi created by the bengali writer sharadindu bandyopadhyay. the film stars sushant singh rajput anand tiwari both are do ell better. it was a good movie .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Ab Tak Chhappan 2
(According to Rahul Pathak Ab Tak Chhappan 2 is a 4 star movie)
ab tak chhappan 2 is hindi crime film directed by aejaz gulab and written by nilesh girkar. the film is presented by ram gopal varma, and starring nana patekar in the lead role. it also stars gul panag, and ashutosh rana. the film is a sequel to ab tak chhappan.the story revolves around inspector sadhu agashe behaves as the nana patekar. i love nana patekar film which is very chear full and fear full.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Hey Bro
(According to Rahul Pathak Hey Bro is a 4 star movie)
hey bro is hindi comedy action drama film directed by ajay chandhok, produced by vidhi acharya and music by nitz sony nitin arora & sony chandy. the film stars ganesh acharya, maninder and nupur sharma in lead roles with amitabh bachchan, hrithik roshan, akshay kumar, ajay devgun, ranveer singh, prabhudeva do a great job as i expexcted in this movie.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
I Love New Year
(According to Rahul Pathak I Love New Year is a 4 star movie)
i love new year is an indian romantic comedy film directed by radhika rao and vinay sapru starring sunny deol and kangana ranaut in lead roles. the film is produced by bhushan kumar and krishan kumar . it was a good movie which is very lovely . good action . comedy was also good .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Second Hand Husband
(According to Rahul Pathak Second Hand Husband is a 5 star movie)
second hand husband is 2015 hindi language indian film produced by gb entertainment and directed by smeep kang and starring gippy grewal, tina ahuja, and dharmendra. the film marks the bollywood film debut of govinda’s daughter, tina ahuja. geeta basra joined the cast in december 2014. govinda’s daughter narmmadaa is being launched in the film as tina ahuja.
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Baahubali
(According to Rahul Pathak Baahubali is a 5 star movie)
bahubali was a good indian film but from begning to end of movie somthnig went wrong. what i told about this u see clearly in this movie . at the ending of this movie waht a suspence created by the director which is very bad not well better but overall good movie .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Bajrangi Bhaijaan
(According to Rahul Pathak Bajrangi Bhaijaan is a 5 star movie)
i love this movie vry much . becoz it was a geart work of salman khan . who remember in future from this type of ocassion. a small little baby who left in india whe was not able to meet his family but with the help of sqalman khan she will go her country and meet with her family .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Uvaa
(According to Rahul Pathak Uvaa is a 4 star movie)
vikrant lavan mohit every one do their best in this movie . this was a geart youngestr film and faboulous. film script was not cry baad but overl all performance was very good and even i thoght it was poor but my thought was wrong when i see tis movie .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Miss Tanakpur Haazir Ho
(According to Rahul Pathak Miss Tanakpur Haazir Ho is a 5 star movie)
what a movie i m shocked very time as i watched this on theater . vinod bhai do good for his future . i think it was a fabulous movies that never i forget easily on every thime i thought about this . i want to again and again with my friends .
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Review Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
Jazbaa
(According to Rahul Pathak Jazbaa is a 4 star movie)
there are punch-packed dialogue and superb cinematography. aishwarya makes a stunning impact which was very interestingly. finest work so far. two major strengths of this film is irrfan khan and aishwarya rai. they do excellent performance as i expexted. what a lovely stunt and performance. its is too good. it is a come back film for aishwarya rai. do watched jazbaa will b glued to ur seats.
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Review Posted on : 9 Oct 2015
Katti Batti
(According to Rahul Pathak Katti Batti is a 4 star movie)
katti batti was good movie it was directed by nikhil who do their bes in this movies. over all conclusion of this movies was very good. great art wrk. katti batti was base on romantic and time enjoyable movies. when i se first time on releasing of this movies my whole day get dipped on the story of this movie.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
Singh Is Bliing
(According to Rahul Pathak Singh Is Bliing is a 5 star movie)
director prabhu deva do great work as i expected. akshay kumar is a great acting hounar. akshay kumar earnest act and lara dutta superb comedy are the only bright points in the film. its a money back movie. good comedy, actions means this film is go for big hit because its was full entertainment movie.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
Talvar
(According to Rahul Pathak Talvar is a 4 star movie)
14 year old girl shruti tandon is brutally murdered inside her bedroom in the house. next day, the domestic help of the family, khempal's body is found on the terrace of the house. the parents, ramesh and nutan tandon don't get the luxury of mourning over her death as soon after, they are embroiled in a situation where the father is suspected of killing her. the question is did the father really kill her? the story of talvar is based on the sensational noida double murder case of arushi talwar and the domestic help of the talwar family, hemraj in 2008. and clearly, vishal bhardwaj is rooting for the innocence of the talwar couple, who have been convicted for the double murder.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
Calendar Girls
(According to Rahul Pathak Calendar Girls is a 3 star movie)
calendar girls has a surreal, slightly dated quality. characters resembling other characters - neha dhupia, akshaye khanna, mamta kulkarni, even a cop like shatrughan sinha - float in and out. the story resembles other madhur bhandarkar stories - a note from page three, a stroke of fashion, far too much from heroine. there's even bhandarkar himself, but sans his once-sharp eye, mouthing, "meri heroine se ek hi expression mil raha hai" - which describes calendar girls too. despite this layered story of ambition, manipulation and desperation, where betting, bedding, broads and broadcasting meet, not much changes on the calendar girls' faces. when nandita's in-laws say cheating is their 'family parampara' or timmy enquires, "when was the last time you really felt a man?", not an eyelash flickers, not a lip quivers. only keith sequeira stands out as paroma's boyfriend pinaki and ruhi as fiesty mayuri makes passing impact. over-acting as a high-class madam, giving kathakali-style glares, mita vashisht tries tilting the feeble dramatic balance - and fails. dialogues don't help. nazneen's boyfriend snarls she'll become a 'bleddy cheapo' while mayuri is constantly praised, "tum bahut aage jaogi" - which is not something you can say for this film that, despite all its curves, stays flat. it's a pity because this story could have broken new ground. with glimpses of his original flair, bhandarkar puts cricket enthusiasts, prostitutes, 'pahwa' brokers, philanderers, builders and bewildered middle-class mata-pitas together. he has his trademark touches of glamour, pathos and personalities but lacks power-packed acting to hold this together.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
Kis Kisko Pyaar Karu
(According to Rahul Pathak Kis Kisko Pyaar Karu is a 4 star movie)
kapil do his debut good. bindas performance i love this. its was average film not very good. kapil sharma do the job of hero but not cleary do his job. he marred with four girls what a thought of director abbas mustan it is attract peoples for watching this movie.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
Msg-2 The Messenger
(According to Rahul Pathak Msg-2 The Messenger is a 2 star movie)
gurmeet ram rahim singh do well. tis film is a fictitious piece of art and protagonist don't claim to have any miraculous power. songs are neither good nor performance memorable. in tis movie the computer generated images of animals like the python, the elephant, the bull, abd the water are tad tacky.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
Maze Runner : The Scorch Trials
(According to Rahul Pathak Maze Runner : The Scorch Trials is a 4 star movie)
maze runner eas the good science fiction american action film which was directed byvwes ball. its was based on old version film the maze runner. the starsvof this movies do well. this movie was good for students. when i saw this movie i feel good i take intrest in science field.
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Review Posted on : 3 Oct 2015

Joke Posted By Rahul Pathak

More Latest Joke

doctor vs journalist

a journalist went to a mental hospital and asked a doctor,
journalist: “how do you determine whether to admit a patient or not?”
doctor: “well, we first fill a bathtub and give a teaspoon, a glass & a bucket to the patient and ask them to empty the bathtub.”
journalist: “yeah, obviously a normal person would use the bucket because its bigger.”
doctor: “no, a normal person would pull the drain plug, now will you please proceed to bed no.39.”

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
More Latest Joke

happiness

what is happiness?
switching off the bathroom lights
just to annoy the person inside

Views : 194    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Jan 2016
More Latest Joke

engineers buy ipl team

if engineers buy ipl team the names of the teams would be 1.rajasthan rectifiers 2.kolkata fuse wires 3.mumbai indicators 4.delhi bearings 5.deccan capacitors 6.chennai super conductors 7.bangalore backloggers 8.punjab p-n junctions

Views : 287    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Nov 2015
More Latest Joke

great engineers thought

can u prove papa=mama?
ias-imposible! doctor-no! engineers start solving- f=ma p.a=ma on squaring, pa.pa=ma.ma

Views : 239    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Nov 2015
More Latest Joke

engginering shyari

wo almari hi kya jisme rack nahi.. . wah-wah . wo almari hi kya jisme rack nahi.. . wah-wah . aur wo engginering hi kya jisme back nhi..!!

Views : 332    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Nov 2015
More Latest Joke

great shyari

tairna hai to sagar ki laharon me tairo,
kinaron me kya rakkha hai !

mohabbat karana hai to vatan (mulk) se karo,
ladakiyon me kya rakkha hai !!

Views : 335    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Nov 2015
More Latest Joke

An engineering Student

an engineering student went & proposed a
girl

girl : what can u do to make me love you ?

boy : i will do what ever u want, i will bring
stars from the sky, i will jump from where ever u say, i will
do anything for u.
girl : can u complete ur enggnrng without a
single back??
.
.
.
boy : chalta hu behan..... apna khyal rakhna ...

Views : 327    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Nov 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-judge

santa :judge sahab, mujhe talaq chahiye



pichhle ek saal se meri biwi ne mujhse baat nahi ki.



judge :ek baar firse sochle, aisi biwi kismat se milti hai !!!


Views : 446    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband - wife

wife: if i removed da cook & make da food myself 4 a month,what will u pay me?



husband: i don't hav 2 pay u, u will get my entire insurance amount

Views : 342    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

wife is great

man on his death bed confesses 2 his wife-i had an affair with ur sister, ur best frd & the maid.

wife : i know darling. now relax & let the poison work

Views : 340    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband - wife

wife: mein jab gaana gaati hoon

toh aap balcony mein kyon chale jate ho?



husband: taki kahin muhalle wale aisa na samjhe

ki mein tumara gala daba raha hoon


Views : 376    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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biwi shuhar

bivi shohar se : munna itni dair se ro raha hai magar tumhain fursat nahi kae isay thoori dair kae liye goud mein utha lo akhir mein esay dhaiz mein to nahi laai thi? shohar bhi ghusay se: tum to aisy keh rahi ho jaisay mein easy apna barati bana kar laya tha.

Views : 359    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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husband - wife

wife : look a thief has entered our kitchen



n he is eating d cake prepared by me



husband: whom should i cal



now police or ambulance


Views : 305    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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ek Dolatmand Admi

ek dolatmand admi shadeed bimaar tha,

jab is k akhiri lamhaat kareeb aye to doctorz ne jawab de dia,

his wife said:tum abhi nahi mar saktay,

khuda k liay abhi na maro.

martay huay shakhs ne jawab dia:begum mat ro,sabr kro,ab m??n chund lamhoon ka mehmaan hoon.

wife:nahi, , ,!

nahi, , ,!!!

tum aj mar kr mujhay zaleel nahi kr saktay,

mainay tumharay sog me pehnnay wala kala suit darzi ko silnay dia hai,jo mujhay kal milay ga ?

Views : 386    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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husband - wife

a small argument betwn a couple turns violent.



angry husband: do not let d animal in me cum out.



wife: who is scared of a mouse!

Views : 191    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

biwi shuhar

biwi(gusse mein) : tumhare dimaag me to sirf gobar hi bhara hai???!

shuhar(pyar se) : to phir itni der se kha kion rahi ho???.


Views : 389    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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wife - doctor

wife to doctor: doctor, i think my husband has a fearfull disease. i talk to him for hours and he doesn?t hear a word i say.

doctor: that?s not a disease, its a gift!

Views : 145    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband - wife

wife-kyu ji,



jab b me aapke

pas aati hu to aap chasma

pahen lete ho?



husband-doctor ne kaha hai

jab sir-dard aaye to

chasma pahen lena!


Views : 337    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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A Wife's prayer

a wife's prayer:

lord

give me wisdom to understand my husband

love to forgive him

patience with his moods

but

don-t give me strength

i will kill that bastard..

Views : 112    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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husband - wife

husband: i am going out for five days!



wife: ok but don-t surprise me by coming back early, otherwise u-ll be surprised.

Views : 194    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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pati patni

pati patni ghumne gaye.







raste mein gadha ghas kha raha tha.







patni: wo dekho tumhara rishtedar ghas kha raha hai. namaste karo.







pati: namaste sasurji

Views : 315    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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two friends

1st friend: my wife CONVERTed me to religion.

2nd friend: really?

1st friend: yes. until i married her i didnt believe in hell

Views : 126    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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husband - wife

husbnd : kya tumne mujhe kutta kaha?



no ans.



husbnd again asks, no ans.



then again he asks,



wife: nahi kaha.



please ab bhoka na bandh karo

Views : 296    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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very funny

1 sahab ki lottery main paris tour ka prize nikal aya.!



usne office say foran wife ko fone kiya or khushi say bola



darling !

mere sath paris chalogi ?



wife khushi say boli:-

han bilkul !

paris to 1 muddat say mere khwabon main basa hai.

main aap k sath zarur chalungi !

magar ap kon sahab bol rahe hain?

Views : 279    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband - wife

husband: hypnotise karna kya hota hy?

wife: kisi ko apnay control me kar k apni marzi k kaam karwaana



husband: chal jhoti,usay to shadi kehte hain

Views : 271    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband - wife

husband:

you know,

wife, our son got his brain from me.

wife: i think he did ,

i still got mine with me!


Views : 195    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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Husband aur Wife Hotel me gaye

husband aur wife hotel me gaye tabhi 1 lady ne hello kiya,

wife nay pocha,?koun thi wo??

husband:-tum dimagh kharab mat karo,

main pehle hi pareshan hun k woh bhi yehi pochay gi.

Views : 315    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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husband - wife

wife: wo samay jo admi drink ker raha hai,

usko main nay 10 saal pehlay shadi k

liye inkaar kia tha.

aaj tak sharab pee raha hay!

husband: wow! itni lambi celebration


Views : 267    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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shyari

arz kiya hai....

ishq karne se pahle ishq ka anjaam dekhlo
ishq karne se pahle ishq ka anjaam dekhlo
fir na samajh aye to film gajni aur tere naam dekhlo

Views : 263    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

boy girl

kanjus ki beti boyfriend se:-kal mere papa ne mujhe tumhare sath bike pe jate hue dekha.
boy(dar ke bola): phir?
girl:-phir kya, mujhse bus ka paise wapas le liye

Views : 277    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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nice

police-jab tumhare ghar chori huii tab kitne baje the. ram- mere pairo par do pet aur sar par ek ek laathi baji thi!

Views : 278    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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boy and girl

boy:i luv u..

girl:i hate u..
boy: why dis kolavery kolavery di?
why dis kolavery kolavery di?

girl:a baba, i luv u 2..!
but pahale ye gana band kr.!.!!

Views : 286    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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thought of the day

apna pyar jo nirma nahi phahle istmal karo fir viswas karo apna pyar to lic he jo zindgi ke shat bi zindgi ke bad bi

Views : 268    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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SANTA VS MASTEJI

masterji to santa
masterji-tum is samay bahut sararti ho gaye ho,mujhe tumhari sikayt krne tumhare ghar jana hai,btao tumhara ghar kaha hai?
santa-sir mera ghar dukan ke samne hai,
masteji-aur dukan kaha hai?
santa-sir mere ghar ke samne,
masterji,jor se gusse me.aur e dono kaha hai?
santa-sir aamne-samne


Views : 275    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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funny shyari

upar dekha to aasman nila ,
pani me gira to rumal gila ,
pyar to sabhi karte he,
par me karu to sala charactar dhila hai..

Views : 242    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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best dialog

durse dekha to sher najar aa raha tha darke mare me pas hi nahi gaya

Views : 232    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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Ek bar santa bank gya

ek bar santa bank me paise nikalne gaya casiar lady_ sab so so ke du to chalga na sir .
santa _o my god yaar kitthi soni kudi hai tu khade khade de to bhi chalega

Views : 240    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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Branded shirt

boy friend to girl friend- yu mat khich tu mujhe apni taraf ae sanam,






branded shirt hai, phat gayi to bahut mar khayegi ma kasam.

Views : 276    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
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kunware

kunwaron se log puchhte hain ki tumhari ab tk shaadi kyon nahein huye.? kunware bhi jor se kahte hain.jaako rakhe sayeean mar sake na koi.

Views : 253    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 1 Nov 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

Bf and gf

gf: never waste your feelings on someone who doesn't value them.
bf: oh! yes never waste your money on someone who is going to be ur x

Views : 258    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 26 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

A Successful Doctor

a successful doctor
is one who knows
the art of keeping
the patient busy
in investigations
and prescriptions till
nature cures the disease

Views : 401    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
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what is drinks

drinks
d-elicious aftr 1 peg
r-omantic aftr 2 peg
i-nterested aftr 3 peg
n-aughty aftr 4 peg
k-ing aftr 5 peg
s-nake aftr 6 peg.
cheers!!!

Views : 300    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
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Heart Of Boys are Like a Temple

heart of boy are like a temple....

holy
truthful
pure
.
.
.
.
thats why,
when boys say..
i love you
.
.
.
.
.

girls remove their slippers.

Views : 264    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
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true fact

never allow
a girl
to talk
too much
to you.!

else

later, she will
make you
talk alone..
love sucks!

Views : 249    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
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funny shyari

tuje suraj kahu par usme aag hai,tuje chand kahu par usme dag hai,ji chahta hai tuje bandar kahdu,par sala usme b dimag hai

Views : 326    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
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thought of the day

when a man opens the door of his car for his girlfriend,
you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the girlfriend

Views : 126    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 22 Oct 2015
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santa-wife

santa darwaze pe gun liye khada tha,
uski patni ne pucha - why are you standing here,
santa- sher ke shikar pe ja raha hu
wife- to jao na
santa- kese jao bahar kutta khada hai

Views : 321    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 19 Oct 2015
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santa banta

santa: jab insane ko zindage me koi problem hota kiske pas jana chaiye?
banta: kisan k pas
santa: kyu?
banta: kyoki kisan k pass hal hota hai.

Views : 283    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 19 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa banta

santa kafi time baad
usa se
vapis india aya to
banta usko
recieve karne gaya
airport se vo santa ko
leke
bahar nikla to santa
ne
sadak
se gili mitti uthayi aur
soongh ke
bola
santa: yaar bantya,
ap
apne
desh ki mitti ki khusbu
pahle
jaisi nahi rahi
banta gusse se: abe
oye
gadhe, tune mitti nahi
tatti uthai
hai

Views : 270    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 19 Oct 2015
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santa-girl

santa college ki ladki se bola
i love u
ab tum muje bolo
girl: me abi ja k sir ko bolti hu
santa: pagli sir ko mt bol,
unki shadi ho gai h.

Views : 269    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 19 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa banta

banta: yaar santa,
agar maa ke kadmo me jannat hoti h to
naani ke kadmo me kya hoti hai?
.
.
.
.
.
.
santa (thodi der sochne k baad): jannat-2

Views : 246    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 19 Oct 2015
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teacher sardar

teacher- chand par pehla kadam kisne rakha?
sardar- neil amstrong
teacher- aur doosra?
sardar- teri maa ki
doosra bhi usi ne rakha hoga
langda thodi tha woh.

Views : 312    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 19 Oct 2015
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dada ji aur pota

dadaji: beta zara mere
daant
lana
pota: lekin abhi roti to
paki
nahi hai
dadaji: abe, roti ko mar
goli
samne wali
budiya smile de rahi
hai.

Views : 245    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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funny shayari

ye shayari likhna unka kaam nahi,
jinke dil aankhon mein basa karte hai
shayari toh voh sakhas likhte hai,
jo sharab se nahi, kalam se nasha karte hai…

Views : 282    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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If Bollywood Movies Were Directed In Pubs & Bars

if bollywood movies were directed in pubs & bars:
1. sita aur margarita
2. corona pyaar hai
3. soda akbar
4. rab ne pila di thodi
5. rum whiskey se kam nahi
6. rum de basanti
7. hum tight ho chuke sanam
8. pissed out at lokhandwala
9. jo pilaye wahi bartender
10. rum maaro rum
11. beer zaara
12. bev-d
13. beer belly
14. gin na milegi dubara

Views : 251    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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child - god

child: god. plz i don't want 3rd world war.

god: why? do u luv ur country so much?child:

no god. i'm weak in history...!i can't study another war...

Views : 119    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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santa-jeeto

jeeto: u know, husband wife aren't allowed to be together in heaven

santa: yes, i do.that's why it's called heaven!

Views : 99    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband wife

wife: i hate da beggar who came yesterday!

husband: y?

wife: i gave him food yesterday n 2day he gifted me book how 2 cook!!

Views : 192    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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boss-santa

boss: tumhara janam kahan hua tha..?
sardar-tiruvanantpuram mein...
boss: spelling batao ?
sardar: mazak kar raha hun, goa me hua tha.

Views : 275    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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son papa

papa-ye kya tumhare maths me 1marks aaya hai

son-jab irado me ho dugni chamak to hoslo me q nhi
:

papa- wat?

sirf 2 zero ka fark hai papa aa jayenge...........

Views : 288    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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rajnikant shayari

rajinikanth shayari....
barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum wah wah
barish hui aur bheeg gaye hum wah wah

are aage kya hua?

hona kya tharajnikant ne phoonk mari aur sukh gaye hum.

Views : 268    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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professor-santa.

professor:chemical symbol of barium?
santa: ba

professor:for sodium?
santa: na

professor:what will we get if 1 atom of ba& 2 atoms of na combined?
santa: banana

Views : 97    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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theory of motion

theory of motion santa badly wanted to be known as a great man. so
after long research he made a new addition to newton’s law. and was
awarded the 2010 nobel prize for his new theory of motion

and it says
..... loose motion can never be done in slow motion

Views : 101    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa
k ghar navjot singh siddhu ki tasvir lagi hui thi.

banta: ye kyon laga
rakhi hai?

santa: laughing buddha lene gaya tha.dukandar ne kaha ye
latest hai.

Views : 256    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
More Rajinikanth Joke

harry potter

1 day rajnikanth got angry on his sweeper boy..

he kicked him so hard that he went flyin in d sky wit his broom..

today that boy is famous as harry potter

Views : 394    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

girl boy

boy: do you love me....??

girl: yes...

boy: starts running

girl: where are you going....??

boy: i'm going to update my relationship status on facebook..... !!

Views : 429    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
More Rajinikanth Joke

rajanikanth vs santa

teacher: what's half of 8?

rajinikanth: 4

santa: depend karta hai agar horizontally half karo to 0 and vertically karo to 3... 4 is the first time in history.

Views : 354    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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dadi - pota

pota - daadi aapne kon-kon se desh ghume hai...

dadi - beta pakistan hindustan aur afganistan...

pota - ab aap kaha ghumne jaogi??

piche se dada bola - kabristaan

Views : 358    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
More Rajinikanth Joke

latest news

guys latest news...

rajnikant warnd evry1 to stop jokes on him..

otherwise...
....
.
.
.
.
.
he'll delete internet..

Views : 287    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 18 Oct 2015
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Best ad by an AC company

best ad by an ac company-
buy acs because the youth of today are COMMITting suicides using fans!

Views : 98    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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santa-pappu

santa: dear son, this time you have to get at least 95\\% marks.
pappu: no dad, i will get 100\\% this time. santa: why are u making a joke..
pappu: who started first..

Views : 114    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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shayari

shadi karna tha par kismat khuli nahi, tajmahal bana tha per mumtaz mili nahi, ab kismat khuli, shadi hue, ab tajmahal banana chahta hon,per ya mumtaz marti nahi!

Views : 249    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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very funny

today is the death anniversary of superman
so, in his remembrance, plz wear a red underwear on top of ur pant n fly around ur room in silence for 1 minute..

Views : 101    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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tongue Twister

tongue twister :
she offered him honour..
he honoured her offer..
& then..
the whole night..
in honour of her offer..
he was onher, offher

Views : 111    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Dad-Daughter

daughter- i am in love with neighbour,so i am running away with him.
dad- thanks dear,u hav saved money & time.
daugter- dad! i am reading dis letter left by mom!

Views : 95    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Scientific Joke

ultimate scientific joke:

what will u call 2nd and 3rd editions of nano car..


sodium nitrite and n sodium nitrate!


because it will be
nano2 & nano3

Views : 97    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

Husband went to abroad for 15 days

husband went to abroad for 15 days.
wife: darling its 15 days now. when will u come back.. i am half-dead.

husband: half-dead! ok then i will come after 15 days.

Views : 195    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
More Rajinikanth Joke

Rajanikant is remaking TITANIC with some changes.

rajanikant is remaking titanic with some changes...
in the end he doesnt die but swims across the ocean wth heroine in 1 hand and





titanic on the other hand..

Views : 348    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Once their was a fight between me and the tiger.

once their was a fight between me and the tiger.

i ran away

to save the tiger

because their only 1411 tiger left.

Views : 247    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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ATTIDUDE

attidude
i dont have any girl frnd it doesn-t mean that i am afraid of proposing a girl but i am scared that wat if she says yes

Views : 223    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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about girls

girl are like a internet virus: they enter ur life, scan ur pockets, edit ur mind, download problems and delete ur happiness.. issued in public interest, so avoid girls

Views : 169    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Sardar wrote a letter to BillGates

sardar wrote a letter to billgates: sir i have sum questns 2 ask
1)d keys on d keyboard are not in order, wen wil u release the correctd versin..
2)der is start buttn bt no stop button. why so..
3)we learnt ms word, wen wil u release ms sentence..
finally a personal question. why is ur name gates, even though u sell windows..

Views : 185    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Girls Status on facebook

girls status on facebook : feeling sad
17021 comments

guys status : goin 2 suicide
2 likes
and
1 comment which reads dude whos gonna use ur bike nw.

Views : 187    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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god

god made man and then rested. god made women and then no one rested

Views : 157    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Technology Impact

technology impact:

dad emails:

dear son,
how hav u been..
ur mom & i are fine & we miss u a lot..
plz turnoff ur pc & come downstairs for dinner.

Views : 166    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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When I was born

when i was born devil said…oh shit!!! another god!!!..& when u were born devil said …oh shit!!!!competition…!!!

Views : 119    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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teacher-student

teacher: where is everest..
student: i don kno..
teacher: u stand on the desk!
student: stil cannot see ma-am

Views : 125    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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thought of the day

if u don-t have a girlfriend
u wil miss something in life..
& if u have a gf then u will miss evering thing in life

Views : 143    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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BUDUK BUDUK

do u know how titanic sunk.. . .

.

.

.

buduk
buduk
buduk..
gulum..
gulu gulu gulu
puchik!

Views : 149    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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BILLIONARE

can a girl make u a millionare..
yes !
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

conditions apply:
u must be a billionare

Views : 156    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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An aeroplane asks to a rocke

an aeroplane asks to a rocket: how is that you can fly so fast..
the rocket replies you will know the pain when they put fire at your ass!

Views : 141    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Grammar Teacher vs student

grammar teacher : peter does not flirt with women.
what is peter in the sentence..
student: maam,peter is gay..

Views : 149    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Cloromint

pata hai aap cloromint kyu khati ho..
qki

5-star

cadbury


park

dairymilk

kit-kat

or

munch

50 paise me nahi aati.
haha
ab dubara mat puchna!

Views : 295    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Munna-Circuit

munna:circuit yar barish k waqt bijali kyu chamkti he
circuit:bhai boleto uparwala torch maar k dekhta ho ga ki kahi sala sukha to nahi rehgaya

Views : 259    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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LAZIEST inventor

who do you think is the laziest inventor of all times..

it-s the guy who invented the snooze in an alarm

Views : 103    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa: oye yaar! agar electricity nahi hoti to kya hota..
banta: kuch nahi yaar, hame candle light me t.v dekhna padta…

Views : 289    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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jai hind

love the lady
but dont touch
the body
if u touch the body
u become a daddy


Views : 96    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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A boy touched his girl friend

a boy touched his girl friend..

girl said..don-t touch me..all dat only after marriage..

boy said : ok .

call me after your marriage!

Views : 89    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Smile

smile is cheaper then electricity,
but gives more light to your life...
so, always smile and prove that,
u r d bst tubelight!
ha.ha.ha

Views : 99    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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A little bird

a little bird was flying in winter.the bird froze and afell to ground. a cow came by & dropped some dung ona it.bird began 2 realize how warm it was & soon began to sing for joy.a passing cat heard the bird singing & dug him out & ate him.
lessons to learn !
1. not everyone who drops shit on u is ur enemy.
2. not everyone who gets u out of shit is ur friend.
3. when you-re in deep shit, keep ur mouth shut!

Views : 102    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 17 Oct 2015
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Ek baar SANTA apni bimaar maa

ek baar santa apni bimaar maa ko doctor k pass lekar gaya
doctor :- sabse pehle apki maa k kuch test honge!!
santa :- are baap re meri maa to anpadh hai

Views : 288    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa sarab pee kr k skutar chalata h

santa sharab pi k scuter se 1 arthi se tkra gya
dead body gir gyi,
log snta ko pitne lge..
santa -abe jo gira h vo to kuch bol ni rha
tum kahe neta ban rhe ho.

Views : 274    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa aur aadmi

1 aadmi akhrot bech raha tha.
santa ne poocha - ye khane se kya hota hai ?
aadmi - dimagh tez hotahai
santa : kaise?
aadmi : acchha ye batao 1 kilo chaawal me kitne daane hote hain ?
santa : pata naheen..
aadmi ne usko aek akhrot khilaya.
aur bola: batao 1darzan me kitne kele hote hai ?
santa : 12
aadmi : dekha , dimaag tez hua na ...
santa : 1 kilo de do...

Views : 276    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa in LPG queue

santa in lpg queue:
cylinder ki lambi line dekh santa gusse me bola - abhi jake desh k netao ko joote mar ke aata hu
kuchh der baad wo wapas line mein laga.
banta ne puchha - joote maar diye kya?
santa - waha iss say bhi lambi line lagi hai..

Views : 267    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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meri ahmiyat

maana k teri nazar mein kuch bhi nahi hu main
meri ahmiyat unse puch.
jinke maine paise dene hain

Views : 343    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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reality of girl friend

main chahe bhai se ladungi, maa-baap se ladungi,
rishtedaaro se ladungi, padosi ke kutte se ladungi, par
ghussa aa k tumpe hi utarungi jaan

Views : 256    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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ek anokha sawaal

ek anokha sawaal:
agar tension ka talluk dimaag se
hai,
to heart attck q aata hai ?
aur
agar love ka taalluk dil se hai,
to pyaar me log pagal q hote.!

Views : 279    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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true lines

true lines
bachpan me ham waha sona pasand karte the jaha se chand tare dikhe. .
aur aaj waha jaha charger laga sake.
aisa nhi k ye zindgi buri hai,
par school or clg life ki baat kuch or thi
aisa nhi k ab hasi nhi aati,
par dosto me beth kr khilkhilane wali bat kuch or thi
aisa nhi k ab tension se raat nhi guzarti,
par exams ki raato me jagne wali bat kuch or thi.
aisa nhi k aage aa kr kuch hasil na kiya ho,
par passing marks le kr party udane wali bat kuch or
thi.
aisa nhi h ki ab logo ko jante pehchante nahi,
but woh duur se 'kamine rukk' bolke dost ko awaz dene ki baat hi kuch aur thi
aisa nahi hai ki ab tiffin share nahi karte,
but canteen mein kisi aur ke plate se cheen ke khane ki baat kuch aur thi
aisa nhi k ab zindgi nhi kat rhi hai,
par dosto me zindgi jjine ki bat hi kuch or thi
dedicated to all friends
for your busy scedule in your job n busines

Views : 231    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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tooth brush

jinke paas hai..
woh haath me leke hilate hai,
jinke paas nahi hai..
woh ungli dalke kam chalate hai
bolo kya?
dirty mind …… it is ….. tooth brush

Views : 282    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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friendship

girlfriend is hot water,
lover is mineral water,
wife is corporation water,
relationship is kaveri water,
but friendship is pure rain
water!!!
so guys plz... respect your friends.

Views : 219    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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me watching tv alone

me watching tv alone.!!
ads: cycle agarbatti, maggi, noodles, ultratech
cement, etc etc
suddenly parents enter.!!
ads: manforce condms, whisper choice, set
wet very very sxy etc

Views : 109    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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sanjay dutt

after seeing sanjay dutt on parole of 14 days my mom asked me, dekho jail mein bhi chhutti milti hai
tum kis company mein kaam karte ho jaha koi chhutti nahi milti.

Views : 212    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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strange line

strange lines, but its true
ek phoolwale ki dukan ke board par likha tha
insaan ko apni jindagi ke har raaste par jeet chahiye
lekin
wo mere pass aakar haar mangta hai.

Views : 244    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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indian logic

indian parents logic:
ghanta is a gali
and
babaji ka thullu is not

Views : 99    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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basmati rice

agar aap aur aapke life partner hamesha khush aur sukhi jeevan bitana chahte hain to
istemaal kre
kohinoor
basmati rice
acha khaoge tabhi to achha soch paoge.

Views : 456    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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What is the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer

what is the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer....
a good lawyer knows the law well &; a great lawyer knows the judge very well

Views : 197    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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Best Punishment

best punishment dat u can give 2 male..

giv him a mobile with a

set of girls phone no.s &; put him

in a place where theres no netwrk

Views : 168    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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17century mom 2 her son

17century mom 2 her son
beta apne religion k ladkise shadi krna
18cntry-apne caste k
19cntry-apne level k
20cntry-apne desh
21cntry-koi bi par ladki se karna

Views : 282    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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re-tying the Lungi..

why is industrial growth so slow in tamilnadu & kerala..
coz 86\\% of the work time is spent on lifting,folding, holding & re-tying the lungi..

Views : 91    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
More Intellectual Joke

A man in USA saw a dog attacking a lady

a man in usa saw a dog attacking a lady, he kicked the dog - it died.
newspaper reported: local hero saved lady from a crazy dog!
man said, i am not american
report changed to: foreign hero saved lady from a crazy dog!
man said, actually i am pakistani
report changed to: terrorist killed an innocent dog

Views : 369    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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Santa ne mithai ki shop kholi

santa ne mithai ki shop kholi,
aur bahar 1 ishtihaar lagaya,
1 noukar ki zarurat hai
jisko
.
.
.
.
.
..
diabetes ho

Views : 288    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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1 Sardarni behosh ho gayi

1 sardarni behosh ho gayi.
doctor-ye mar gayi hai.
jb usko jalane lage to wo uth k boli-mai zinda hu!
sardar- chupchap padi reh, tu doctor se zyada janti hai kya!!!

Views : 274    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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Bhagwan tu muje 100 Rs dega to 50 tumhe chadhaunga

banta bola-
bhagwan tu muje 100 rs dega to 50 tumhe chadhaunga.

thodi dur pe usko 50 ka note mila.
banta- prabhu itna sa b bharosa nhi.
pehle hi kaat liya.

Views : 262    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

sardar told his friend, yaar 1 ladki mujko has k dekh rahi hai
kya karu..?

banta: pehle confrm kar, has k dekh rahi hai ya dekh k has rahi hai...

Views : 242    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa car ke pahiye khol raha tha.
banta: oye, pahiye kyun khol raha hae?
santa: anpadh ganwaar ! samne dekh likha hai- parking for 2 wheelars only !

Views : 247    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa-teacher

teacher - what is 'oxford,??
santa- teacher 'ox= bail, and 'ford=gadi,

Views : 226    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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santa-teacher

teacher - baccho jinda rehne ke liye hume kis cheej ki zaroorat hai??
santa- are maidem tina bhi nahi pata jinda rehne ke liye teri kasam 1 mulakat zaroori hai sanam...

Views : 265    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 16 Oct 2015
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1 car ki nilami ho rahi thi

1 car ki nilamii ho rahi thi
1lac,2lac,3lac,
santa shocked:is khatare me aisa kya he

seller:iske 10 accident hua he & har bar wife hi mari he

santa:8lac

Views : 259    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: aao ji chess khelein
banta:tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aya

Views : 254    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Santa throw the butter out of the window?

santa throw the butter out of the window?
socho
.
.

because he wanted to see butterfly!

Views : 321    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Boy-Girl

girl: agar is duniya ke sabi aurat ka ek hi face hota to kya hoga










boy: kuch nahi,gas cylinder ki tarah aj iske ghar jayegi

to kal uske ghar

Views : 293    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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SANTA-DOCTOR

santa-doctor sahab, yeh dawai sare shaher mein kahin bhi nhi mili.
doctor: arey, dawai to main likhna hi bhool gaya yeh toh mere sign hai.

Views : 260    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-teacher

teacher.jawani aur budhape men faraq batao
santa;jawani men mobile men haseeno ke numbar hute hai aur budhape men hakeemo ke

Views : 260    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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SANTA-DOCTOR

sante ke sar se khoon beh raha tha

doctor:ye kaise hua?

santa:me apne haath se pathar thod raha tha,to kisine kaha

kabhi to apna khopedi ka istmaal kar?

Views : 273    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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SANTA-DOCTOR

santa doctor se:mujhe kuch sunai nahi dene ki bimari hai, jab mera patni kuch kehti hai
doctor:ye bimari nahi,yeh to
.
.
.
.
.
bhagwan ki meharbani hai

Views : 267    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Santa ka 50rs ka note train me ghum ho gaya

santa ka 50rs ka note train me ghum ho gaya

ek aadmi:ya,allah bismilah!

santa:tumhe 20(bis) mila to baki tees kisko mila

Views : 250    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa-tere papa doctor hai,aur tu bimar ho gaya! saram ki baat hai.
..
banta-saram ki bat to yeh hai ki tere papa condom bechte hai or tu phir v paida ho gaya...

Views : 225    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa:main apni patni ko kya giftdoon
banta: diamond ring de.
santa:nahi main kuch bada dena chahta hoon,
banta:fir tractor ka tyre de

Views : 207    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Ek baar Santa Gangubai ke ghar jaata hai

ek baar santa gangubai ke ghar jaata hai aur darwaza knock karta hai.
gangubai: kaun ?
santa: main !
gangubai: main kaun?
santa: tu gangubai

Views : 227    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-lady doctor

lady doctor: tum roz subah clinicke bahar khade ho kar aurto ko kyon ghurte ho?
santa: ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai aurton ko dekhne ka samay subah 10 se 12

Views : 187    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Santa apni wife se

santa apni wife se:-tum itni sundar ho, mai tumhe kya kahu
bahar khada uska baap bola:- beta
ek baar maa kah de baaki mai dekh lunga

Views : 206    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Intelligent Sardar

intelligent sardar..........
sardar:- dr. sahab palastic sargery karane me kitna kharchaayega?
dr. :- 5 lakh ka.
sardar:- agar palastic hum de to.

Views : 211    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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SULABH SHOCHALAY

santa:baba mujhe koi aisa kaam batao jahan mujhe kuch na karna pade,log karen aur mujhe paise mile
baba-ja beta sulabh shochalay khol de...

Views : 267    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

banta: teri dukan pe mitthai hai tera dil mithayi khane ko nahi karta?
santa: karta to buhut hai per papa marenge isliye chat kar rakh deta hun

Views : 232    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-police

santa: kal raat chor mere ghar se tv k ilawa sab saamaan le gaye
police: tv kyon nahi le gaye?
santa: tv to mein dekh raha tha na isliye

Views : 217    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: 1 chor ne muje chaku dikha k lut lia,
banta:tere pas to hamesa gun hoti hai,
santa:haan 2 lakh ki hai,maine chhupali thi warna wo bhi le jata .

Views : 196    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa:me yesa kya kru k teri shaadi k baad me teri biwi ko cinema le kr jau aur tu naraj b na ho...
..
..
banta:meri shaadi apni behen se kara de...

Views : 222    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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ek bar Santa Byk se ja raha tha

ek bar santa byk se ja raha tha
1 ladki ko dekhkr wo byk lakr gir gaya.
ladki- o ho chot to nahi lagi??
santa- oye soniye yeh to hamara byk se utrne ka style hai...

Views : 202    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-pilot

santa plane main ja raha tha usne pailot se uska headphone cheen liya.
pilot- are ye kya kar rahe ho??
santa- oye pialot ticket to humne bhi liya hai gane to akela thode hi sunega

Views : 228    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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juli-santa

juli-agar tum so rahe ho to apne sapne bhejo?
agar tum jaag rahe ho to apni yaden bhejo?
agar tum ro rahe ho to apne aashu bhejo?
santa - poti kr raha ho kya bheju..

Views : 225    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa- tu paida kaise hua? banta- hospital mei, aur tu? snta- khouf me! banta- wo kaise? santa- meri maa k pas 2 daaku aaye aur kaha jo kuch hai nikal do

Views : 213    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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teacher-banta

teacher-edison cut his dad's cherry tree, but he told truth dat he cut it his father didnt do anything why? banta-edison still has axe in his hand!

Views : 169    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: why has the govt. fixed voting age 18yrs&marriage age 21yrs? banta: govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin biwi ko nahi

Views : 204    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa-Santa's girfriend

santa's girfriend: meri maa aapko bahut pasand karti hai. santa, after a deep thought: kuchh bhi ho jaye, shaadi to main tujhse hi karunga!

Views : 173    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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pragnency test

arz kiya hai...
normal friend thi wo meri, achanak se mere liye khaas ho gayi
zindagi bhar fail hoti thi, kambakht pregnancy test me pass ho gayi..

Views : 191    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Ek murgi aur uske 3 bache road cross kar rahe the

ek murgi aur uske 3 bache road cross kar rahe the
road cross karne k baad murgi k 1 bache
ne
kaha,
hum saato ne road cross karli
7 kaise..?
socho,
read msg again, thoda dimag lagao..!
arre yaar,
bache hai kuch bhi bolte rehte hai
tum tension mat lo

Views : 446    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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true story

true story
papers ache ho ya bure
papers khatam hone ki khushi bahot hoti he.. :

Views : 212    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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knock knock

knock, knock
kaun??
thakur sholay wala
bhai darwaza khol dunga... pahle
ye
bata ki knock knock kaise kiya..?

Views : 191    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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life is too short

life is too short..
so plz don't waste ur time in removing pendrive safely..
aise hi nikal lo....kuch nahi hota..

Views : 200    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Hollywood logic

hollywood logic:-
chahe kitni bhi badi musibat ho,
jaan mushkil mein padi ho,
par ek smooch to banta hai..

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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turn off wi-fi

when mom wants to find out
where
i'm in the house,
she simply turns off the wi-fi .
damn! this trick always work .

Views : 204    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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it can only happwn in indian movies

in krish , priety got pregnant when hrithik was
not with her in 2 years
dhoom 2. . abhishek bachan jumps off the cliff.
straight on the shoulders of hrithik on a
parachute .
n last one is an epic
sholay where (now) jaya bachchan lights a
lantern in the beginning as there is no
electricity in the village..anddharmendra is on a
water tank to COMMIT suicide
paani ki tanki me bina electriicity ke paani upar
kya thakur chadata tha????

Views : 205    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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mistakes in raone

ra one : when sharukh khan dies, being a south
indian he was given a christian funeral but later
we see kareena kapoor uske asthiyo ko paani
me baha deti hai, this was a big mistake no one
noticed.

Views : 211    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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it can happen only in indian movie

it can happen only in indian movies
baghban:amitabh bachchan and hema malini
are separated right after holi remember
amitabh singing holi khele raghubeera?). they
are said to be separated for six months, ie from
march to september. within that six-month
period, they celebrate valentine's day, which
falls on february 14, and karva chauth, which is
usually observed in october. there is no way
these two occasions could come between
march and september!
u all may know that............

Views : 220    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband wife

husband aur wife subha ghar se apni apni car lekar nikle
husband office chala gaya aur wife gayi market mein, after half an hour wife calls her husband
wife bade pyaar se: janu, car mein ek problem aa gayi hai, iske carburetor mein paani chala gaya hai
husband gusse se: tmhara dimaag to theek hai, tumhe pata bhi hai ki carburetor kya hota hai, tum car batao kahan par hai, mein dekh lunga
wife: kisi ke swimming pool mein

Views : 254    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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top 5 lines

top 5 lies-
5. continue, i am 18+
4. your call is important to us
3. i have read the terms & conditions
2. maggie 2 minutes mein banti hai
1. naya cadbury choclairs, ab chipakta nahi hai..

Views : 226    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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90 birthday party

90s birthday party menu
2 eclairs
samosa / kachori
potato chips
a piece of cake
soft drink / rasna

Views : 242    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Mummy ko bolo complan mein thoda ZEHER mila ke pilaye Seriously

to all those people who discriminate others on the basis of religion,caste,colour or gender and also create useless issues regarding these :
mummy ko bolo complan mein thoda zeher mila ke pilaye
seriously

Views : 293    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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jab bacchpan tha

jab bachpan tha
to jawani ek dream tha
jab jawan huye
to bachpan desire hai.
jab ghar me rehte the
aazadi achi lagti thi
aaj akele hai
to har pal ghar k din yaad aate hai.
kabhi hotel me jana
pizza, burger khana
pasand tha
aaj ghar par aana
aur maa k hath k khane me hi jannat milti hai.
jinse zagadte the school me
un dosto ko aaj internet me talashte hai
aaj kal to khush rehne k tarike b hum
google me search marte hai.
facebook se dating
aur flipkart, ebay se shopping karte hai
ghar par b baat ab
skype/gtalk aur whatsapp se karte hai.
life ko
laptop aur mobile me samet diya hai
hum samazte hai humne
khud ko update kiya hai.
iss nayi duniya me humne
na jane kya ghuma diya hai
kab kya badla
hume kuch na pata chala hai.
paisa mila
naam mila
kuch hai hum b
ye b vishwas mila
lekin kya chhoda
kya tyaga humne
iska na hisab mila.
khushi kisme hoti hai
ye pata ab chala hai
bachpan kya tha
iska ehsas ab hua hai.
kash badal sakte hum
zindgi k kuch saal pichhle
kash ji sakte hum
zindgi ek bar fir se
kash mil sakta bachpan
hume ek bar fir se.

Views : 243    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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shahid-sonakshi

shahid : mujhe bas 2 cheeze aati hai
pyaar pyaar pyaar aur maar maar
maar
sonakshi : par ye toh total 6 ho gayi
naa?
shahid : behan tu ghar jaa tere papa
chinta kar rahe honge

Views : 191    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Sony de Nakhre sohne lagde menu

i love it when my sony smartphone hangs and gives me problems
...
because,
sony de nakhre sohne lagde menu

Views : 292    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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aapka call hamare liye important h

mujhe to khud ki value tab hi pta
chalti hai,
jab customer care wale kehte hai,
aap ka call hmare liye important
hai kripiya line pr bne rahe

Views : 277    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa takes blade n writes his grlfrnd's name on his arms &
after 5 minute jor jor se rota hai
banta: kyu ro rha hai
santa:abey, spelling galat ho gyi

Views : 243    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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Santa biwi k office gaya,

santa biwi k office gaya,
biwi boss ki god me baithi thi,

santa(ghusse se)

chal pammi, esi jagah kam nahi karna jaha staff k liye chair tak na ho

Views : 230    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 15 Oct 2015
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santa banta aur kanta teeno ek baike par ja rahe the

santa,banta aur kanta teeno ek baike par ja rahe the.
rto wale ne dekha aur unhe rokne ke liye hath dikhaya.
banta chillakar bola oye pagal pahle se hi teen baithe hue hai.tu kahan baithe ga?

Views : 243    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa went out to buy an Indian flag

santa went out to buy an indian flag. the shop owner gave him the flag.
.
.
guess what did he ask next....
?
?
?
?
?
ish mei aur colour dikhayiye..

Views : 213    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: kahaa gayaa thaa yaar?

banta: girlfriend ke saath movie dekhne

santa: kitna kharchaa huaa?

banta: 500 rs

santa: itnaa huaa kya?

banta: kya karu? uske paas itnaa hee thaa yaar

Views : 219    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-juice wala

santa- 1 glass juice dena ladayi hone wali hai

santa juice pene ki bad- 1 glass aur do ladayi hone wali hai.


pene ke bad 1 glass aur do ladayi hone wali hai.

juice wala- kab hogi ladayi

santa- jab tu merese paise mangega

Views : 254    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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SANTA-DOCTOR

doctor: bachey ko paani dene se pehle ubaal lena chahiye.
.
.
.
santa: woh to theek hai ji per ubalney se bacha mar to nahi jayega..??

Views : 203    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-captain

captain of military: naujawanon aage bado
santa aage nahin bada
captain: tum aage kyun nahin bade?
santa: apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha

Views : 227    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-Pahalwan

santa-tum 1bar me kitne admi utha sakte ho,

pahalwan-kamse kam 10,

santa-bas!
tumse acha to mera murga h jo subah pure mohalle ko utha deta h

Views : 288    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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ek baar santa cafe main coffe pine jaata hai

ek baar santa cafe main coffe pine jaata hai ...
waiter- sir hot coffe 15 rs.
aur cold coffe 30 rs tbhi santa ek ladke ko dekhkar bhai coffe jaldi pee le agar thandi ho gayi to 30 rs dene padenge

Views : 250    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa:-yaar banta kal mei biwi mere ek dost ke saath bhaag gayi.
banta:-tujhko to bahot yaad aati hogi uski
phir?
santa:-haan yaar …bahot achcha dost tha mera

Views : 290    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa ek dukaan wale se sheesha khareedne gaya

santa ek dukaan wale se sheesha khareedne gaya
santa: iss sheeshe ki majbooti ki kya guarantee hai?
dukaan wala:-ye sheesha yadi aap 100th manzil se fekenge, to ye 99 manzil tak bhi nahin tutega

Views : 344    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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saradr-wife

sardar sir k sath sath kandho par bhi shampu laga raha tha.
wife- kandho pe shampu kyo laga rahe ho?
sardar- pagli ye koi aam shampu nahi hai ye head & shoulder hai..

Views : 251    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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sardar

4 sardar train ke piche bhag rahe the.2 sardar train me chad gaye 2 rah gaye.train yatriyo ne unhe welldone kaha to dono sardar-khak welldon jana to unhe tha hum to chodne aaye the.

Views : 253    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Naai ke paas 5 rupaye Khulle nahin the

santa-tumne itne chhote-chhote
baal kyun katwaye.??
banta-naai ke paas 5 rupaye
khul-le nahin the
to maine kaha ki chal
5 rupaye ke aur kaat de.

Views : 254    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Automobile Enginneer banne

santa ne apni car ke niche
kutte ko sota hua dekha,
to kutte ki taang pakad ke
bahar kicha aur bola-
bahar nikal sale,
bada aaya automobile enginneer banne

Views : 238    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: tune us ladki ke liye cigarette chod di?
banta: haan
santa: daru ko bhi chod diya?
banta: haan
santa: jua bhi chod diya?
banta: haan
santa: abey to fir us se shadi kyu nahi ki?
banta: oh yaar, itna sudhar gaya tha ke usse achhi mil gayi!

Views : 212    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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ek sardar ko puri raat machhron ne bahut pareshan kiya

ek sardar ko puri raat machhron ne bahut pareshan kiy
12 baje uski khopdi ghumi sardar ne zahar pee liya or bola- ab kato salon sab maroge.

Views : 210    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa

1 aadmi chabi se apna kaan khuja raha tha
.
.
.
.
santa use dekh raha tha
.
.
.
kuch der bad bola- bhai sahb agr app start nahi ho rahe ho to dhakka lagadu..

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: kal maine roket chhoda jo suraj se ja takraya.
banta: fir kya hua?
santa: meri boht pitayi hui,
santa: suraj ki mammi ne muje pita..

Views : 225    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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SANTA-PASSENGAR

passengar;tumne mere jab me haath kyu dala?
santa:mujhe machis chahiye thi
passenjar:tum mujhse maang shakte the ?
snta:mai anjan se baat nai karta

Views : 225    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Musibat Ke Wakt Gadhe Ko Bhi Baap Banana Padta Hai

ek baar santa ka dost musibat me tha or wo santa se bola - yaar musibat ke wakt gadhe ko bhi baap banana padta hai
santa - wah yaar teri mummy maan bhi jaati hai

Views : 305    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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20-20 me Dudh ki thaili

santa-aawaj lga rha tha 20-20 me dudh ki thaili ek ledy gyi or sarmakar waps aa gyi
2nd ledy -kya hua
1st ledy-kamina bra bech rha tha

Views : 254    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa calls his wife

santa calls his wife: ghar nahi aa sakta... car ka stearing, gear, break sab chori ho gaye...
.
after 1hour,
he calls: aa raha hu, galti se pichli seat pe baith gaya tha...

Views : 206    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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banta makes question paper

banta is a teacher and exam ke liye question paper banaya..

paper dekhte hi saare bachche behosh ho gaye... question they --

1. china kis desh me hai ?

2. 15 aug kis date ko aati hai ?

3. green rang kis colour ka hota hai ?

4. tamatar ko hindi may kya bolte hai ?

5. mumtaz ki qabar main kon dafan hai

Views : 214    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-waiter

waiter: ur bill sir.
.
.
santa: take my card.
.
.
waiter: but sir, this is ration card.
.
.
santa: to phir bahar kya majaak me likha hai..
.
.
all cards are accepted

Views : 171    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-son

santa's son: papa agar aapko,
rs10 aur rs5 raaste mein pade
miley to aap kaun sa note uthaoge ??
santa : 10 rs ka..
son: isliye aap per joke bante hain..
.
.
.
.
2no bhi to utha saktey ho

Views : 196    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa- itne saare log football ko laat kyu maar rahe hai
banta-abe gadhe goal karne ke liye
santa:-gol hi to hai aur kitna gol karenge

Views : 233    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa:- ager bivi ko bhootni lipat jaye, to tu kya karega ?
.
.
banta:- mujhe kya karna ! ye do behno ka aapsi mamla ha

Views : 216    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa in job interview

in a job interview santa is
asked:
aapko kitne saalo ka tajurba
hai?
banta: sir, maaf karna,
mujhe saalo ka to nahi lekin
mujhe
2 saaliyo ka tajurba hai

Views : 216    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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SANTA-DOCTOR

doctor.: aapke 3 danth kaise tut gaye
santa.: wife ne kadak halwa
banaya tha wo khaya isliye.
.
doctor.: to halwa khane se mana kar dete
.
santa.:-
fir to 32 ke 32 tut jaate

Views : 247    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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sardar

1 sardar london me double daker bus me tha condector ne use upar bhej dia . sardar bhagta hua neche wapas aaya or bola marwaega kya? upar to driver hi nahi h.


Views : 239    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa in KBC

santa in kbc..
qus: videsh jane wali pehli bhartiya mahila kaun thi...?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
santa- sita ji..!
ravan ke sath sri lanka..

Views : 249    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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JUNG main SANTA

jung main santa ne bulet proof jacket ki jagah machrdani pehani banta-aisa kyu?
santa-jisme machar nahi ghus sakta usme goli kaise gusegi

Views : 268    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa Bank Me Khata Kholne Gaya

santa bank me khata kholne gaya.
form me 1 sawal tha,
is bank me khata kholne ki wajah.
santa ne waha likha- aapki khubsurat cashier

Views : 214    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa apne papa ke sath ja raha tha

santa apne papa ke sath ja raha tha
us ka lali pop gir gaya,
to dady ne kha beta chod do
dosra lelegen
2 dinbad un ke sat us ki ma bhi
thi,
ma gir gai to bete ne kha,
daddy chod do dosri lelege

Views : 234    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa public toilet gya

santa public toilet gya or
1 ghante ke bad nikla
bahar baitha jmidar bola- 20rs.
santa- sale toilet main baitha tha
cyber cafe main nahi

Views : 229    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: phone pe itni dheemi aawaz me kis se baat kar raha hai?
banta: behen hai !
santa: to phir itni dheemi aawaz me kis liye?
banta: teri hai is liye

Views : 189    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-wife

santa ki loutri lagi aur
woh ghar pr jakar apni wife se
bola...
santa- agar mere loutri lagi to
tum kya karogi.
wife- 50\\% lekr tumhe chod
dhungi.
santa- yeh le 50 rupye aur nikal
yaha se.

Views : 219    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa:agar biwi k baap ko sasur
kehte hain to,
girlfriend k baap ko kya kahenge???
bnta:agar shadi k liye haa kar de
to sasur nhi to asur...

Views : 278    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa road pe ja raha tha

santa road pe ja raha tha..
samne gobar pada tha. santa ne apni ungli gobar me dali or phir muh me.
or bola ohh gobar tha shukar hai pair nhi pda..

Views : 246    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa rat ko smoking krna chta tha

santa rat ko smoking krna chta tha.
pr use khi pe bhi machis nhi mili...
bechara nirash ho kar mombati ko bhuja kr so gya....

Views : 246    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa

santa ne job k 1st day computr pe 11 ghante guzare
boss khusi se: gud aaj kya kiya
santa:keyboard ki abcd aage piche lgi thi wo sahi kr di

Views : 252    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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SANTA dials a number

santa dials a number
a girl receive
santa-kon
girl-me sita
santa-sorry mataji
ludhyana lagaya tha ayodha lag gaya

Views : 211    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa:jab main paida hua tha to mere papa ne 51 banduke chalwai thi.
.
.
.
banta:kamaal hai,
sabka nishana
chook gaya.

Views : 208    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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santa-god

santa:god 1 ladki chahye,

god:tu muslim h to katrina dunga

pnjabi to karina

bania h to yana gupta
bol tera nam kya h

santa- santa singh gupta khan

Views : 261    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Rang de basanti movie dekh kar santa ko bohut gussa aa gaya

rang de basanti movie dekh kar santa ko bohut gussa aa gaya.

banta- why you are so angry.?

santa-pure film me basanti ko dikhaya hi nhi

Views : 246    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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2 ladies

lady 1: tumhare beta aur beti ki shadi hui hai..tumhari bahu aur damaad kaise hain?
lady 2: meri bahu to bahut buri hai....roz late uthti hai aur mera beta uske liye chai bnata hai
ghar ka koi kaam nhi karti
aur jab dekho mere bete se bahar khana khane ke liye kehti rehti hai
lady 1: aur tumhara damaad?
lady 2 : mera damaad to farishta hai..roz subbha meri beti ko chai bna ke pilata hai aur wo aaram se uthti hai...ussee ghar ka koi kaam karne nhi deta aur ussee aksar bahar khana khane le jata hai...aisa damaad sabko mile.

Views : 267    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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real story

a real story
kulfiwala: kulfi lelo kulfi
baccha: ye kulfi kitne ka hai?
kulfiwala: 2 rupye ka
baccha: ye lo 2 rupye
kulfiwala: ye lo kulfi.
real story hai..!!.........

Views : 246    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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School Mein 1st Class Ka Exam

school mein 1st class ka exam tha, ek bachhe ne exam sheet par tatti kar diya
teacher ne ye dekha aur hairan hote hue student se puchha: oye ye tune kya kiya?
student: sorry ma’am, lekin mummy ne kaha tha jo pahle aaye wohi karna.

Views : 243    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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son-dad

son: mumbai jana he hero banna ha
dad: shakal dekhi he apni? hero banega?
son: shows him deshdrohi movie
dad: flight se jayega ya train se?

Views : 253    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa Ne puri Raat Mujra Dekha

santa ne puri raat mujra dekha.
mujrewali- saheb,
hamne apko khush kiya
ab aap hume khush kar do.

santa- acha to ab tum betho,
mai nachta hu

Views : 295    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Sardar galti se samundar me gir gay

sardar galti se samundar me gir gay
doobte doobte uske haath me machhli lagi, use pakad k bahar phenka aur bola tu to apni jaan bacha le

Views : 270    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 14 Oct 2015
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Santa 1 ghar ke niche su-su kar rha tha

santa 1 ghar ke niche su-su kar rha tha..

.
upar se 1 aurat boli - dikhta nahi hai, diwar hai...
.
santa bola-thoda side se dekho, dikh jayega....!

Views : 290    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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AAJ KUCH TUFAANI KRTE H

santa:- ye thums up walo ne paresaan kr rkhhaa h..,,

bnta:- q..???

snta:- yar bv roz raat ko thodi si pila k zid krti
h chalo aaj kuch tufaani krte h...

Views : 227    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-waiter

santa gusse se:
waiter...
chicken biryani me chiken hi nehi hai..!

waiter: sir: gulab jamun me kon sa gulab haota hai.!

santa- ha yaar,
sorry.!

Views : 231    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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What do u Mean by PHSD

manager- what is your qualification?

santa- i am phsd

manager- what do u mean by phsd

santa- passed high school with difficulty.

Views : 101    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa ne jawab me sms kiya

wife ne santa ko sms kiya
kitni der me aa rhe ho?

santa ne jawab me sms kiya

20-25 mint me aa rha hu,

agr der ho jaye to ye

sms fir se padh lena

Views : 280    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-dukandaar

santa: rasgulle hai?

dukandaar: nahi,!

santa: dekh lunga.

dukandaar (gusse me): kya dekh loge?

santa: dusri dukaan me jakar dekh loonga....!

Views : 237    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

Banta sabzi lene gaya

banta: sabzi lene gaya sabziwala sabzi par pani maar raha tha

kaafi der ho gayi to banta: bola agar sabzi ko hosh aa gaya ho to 1 kilo dedo

Views : 264    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa

santa apni gf ki zulfon me aisa khoya,
ke
behosh ho gaya...
jab hosh aaya to romantic ho kar pucha
jaan! nahati kyun nahi ho..?

Views : 223    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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mummy ko bolo complan pilaye

1 girl fansi laga kar suicide kar rhi thi santa ne window se dekha,






or bola






sirf latakne se height nahi badhegi,mummy ko bolo complan pilaye.

Views : 721    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa vs kidnaper

kidnaper: teri biwi mere
kabze me hai saboot ke taur par uski do ungliya bhijwa raha hoon
santa:sabut pakka nahi hai
.

.

.

.

mundi bhej mundi.

Views : 195    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

banta: santa to truck walo se itna kue darta hai..?
santa: ek bar truck wala meri bivi ko uthakar le gaya. dar jata hu ki wo meri bivi ko wapas chodne to nahi aya hai....!!

Views : 229    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa: mere frnd ne chupke se
mere mobile se meri gf ka number le liya.
banta: fir kya hua..?
santa: bewakoof kal raat se
apni bahen ko romantic msgs bhej
raha hai.

Views : 197    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-nurse

santa went to hospital for ecg.

nurse boli- kapde utaro. . .

santa: pehle ecg kar le? ?
baki toh wo sab baad me bhi kar sakte hai

Views : 280    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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B'Day par Bahut Costly Gift

gf- mere b'day par bahut costly gift dena!
santa- ok!

on the b'day_

santa- your gift.
gf- how sweet! is me kya he?
santa- petrol me tale paneer ke pakode.

Views : 288    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-ladki

santa -tumhe wo bangali ladka kiss kr raha tha,
to tumne use mana kyu nai kiya.?

ladki - mai use mana kaise karti. ! mujhe to bangali bolni hi nai ati. . .

Views : 248    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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BLaCK-BeHRRY

santa: oye tu ladki
dekh aaya?
kaisi he?

tom: rang se kali he aur
kaan se kam sunti he

santa:zara
english me kaho

tom: black-behrry he

Views : 255    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

banta: rail ke patri par leta tha.

santa: tu rail ki patri par kyu leta hai mar jayega.

banta: chal pagal jab mere sar ke upar se airoplane nikal gaya tab tho kuch nhi hua tho ab rail mera kya legi. . .

Views : 260    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa-dhire dhire kuch likh rha tha. .

banta -ye dhire-dhire kya likh rhe ho.

santa-saat saal k bete k liye lettr likh rha hu,
wo tez-tez nhi pad skta. . .

Views : 273    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa banta ki dukaan par shave karne aaye,

banta- muchh rakhni hai.?

santa- han..
.
.

banta (much kaat k)- le rakh le jaha rakhni hai.

Views : 227    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa- meri biwi bahut kharchili he,
jab bi dekho 100rs, 200rs mangti rehti hai...

banta- unn paiso ka wo karti kya he.?

santa- kya pata,
maine kabhi diye hi nahi...

Views : 244    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa- yar aaj tabyat thik nhi h,hr chiz double nazr arhi h....
banta-1000ka note deke, ye le wo 2000,jo last week mene udhar lya tha

Views : 214    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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nokia phone

santa ne nokia ka sabse badi screen wala mobile le liya
.

.

.

kyon??????
.

...
.

.

kyonki woh dekna chahta tha hae ki,

phone switch on karne per kaun se 2 log hath milate hae...

Views : 270    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa- ye bata ki duniya me kitne desh hai?
banta- kar di na paglon wali bat,
duniya me 1 hi desh hai india,
baki sab to videsh hai!

Views : 204    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-teacher

teacher: who kaun hai jo aasman mein udti hai par bachche zameen pe deti hai?
santa kuch dair sochne ke baad: air hostess

Views : 231    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Math Ka Test

santa apne bete pappu ka math ka test le raha hota hai.
santa: beta 5 ke baad kya aata hai?
pappu: 6, 7
santa: wah mera beta to bohat hoshiyaar hai,aur 6, 7 ke baad?
pappu: 8, 9, 10
santa: kya baat hai beta aur uske baad?
pappu: gulam, begum, badshaah

Views : 253    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-naukar

santa naukar se: jara dekh to bahar suraj niklaa hai ya nahi

naukar; bahar to andhera hai,

santa: to torch jala kar dekh le kaamchor..!!

Views : 223    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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SANTA in an interview

santa in an interview......
santa- may i come in sir?
interviewer- wait please.
santa- 76 kg only

Views : 196    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Santa-Jyotishi

santa- meri shaadi kab hogi?

jyotishi- kabhi nahin hogi.

santa- kyon?

jyotishi- kaise hogi, tumhari kismat me toh sukh hi sukh lika hai.

Views : 212    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Battery Low

santa- are yaar ye mobile to mujhe kangal kr dega
banta- q?
santa- baar baar dikhata hai battery low ab tak 50 battery badal chuka hu

Views : 230    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa

santa ek baar park mein beth ker gaana ga
raha tha aaj mein upar aasma niche
.
.
uske paas ek aadmi betha tha usaadmi ne
santa ka gaana sun kar santa ko bahut maara
.
.kyon ???
,
,
,kyon ki aasma us aadmi ki beti ka naam
tha

Views : 203    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Santa in Lift..

santa in lift..
.
.
girl : mehnga perfume laga k lift me ayi,
.
or
.
santa ko akkad k boli cobra perfume, rs.6000
.
.
2nd girl ayi: jasmeen perfume rs.7000
.
.
achanak lift ruk gayi or khuch smell aayi
dono ladkiyon ne apna naak pakda
aur
santa ko dekhne lagi
.
.
santa with smile:- muli 14 rupey kilo.....
santa madhosh........ladkiya behosh........

Views : 218    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Batao A Ke Baad Kya Aata Hai?

teacher: batao a ke baad kya aata hai??
santa kafi der sochne ke baad bola... kya bolti tu....!!!!.

Views : 214    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa:- raat bhut ho gai hai aaj yhi ruk ja kal chale jana.!
banta:- tikh hai to main ghar se night suite le k aata hun.!
santa:- tikh hai jaldi aana...!!!

Views : 188    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa vs wife

santa k 7 bachhon me se ek alag he dikhta tha... ek bar marte time usne apni wife se pucha wo alag sa dikhne wala bachha kiska hai ??? wife:- sirf wohi aapka hai !!!?

Views : 174    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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khubsurat ladki

santa ne ek khubsurat ladki
ko pucha aap kaha rahti ho ?
ladki: m.g.road
banta: itni
khubsurat hokar bhi road par
rahti ho mere ghar chalo na...

Views : 233    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Santa BANK me aake so gaya

santa bank me aake so gaya
.
puchho q.?
.
.
qki..
.
.
usne board par advertise padhi, ki..
.
yaha sone par loan milta hai..

Views : 186    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa - yar banta,pahle tumhare ghar ki nokrani thi vahi kapde dhoya karti thi or aj tum kapde dho rhe ho .
.
.
.
.
.
.....
.
.
.
banta : yar , mene usase shadi kar li

Views : 178    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa

santa rod par potty kr rha tha
tabhi police ne ushe pakad liya
jab police use le ja rhi thi to.....
santa bola :-' bhai sabut to utha lo

Views : 178    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Santa was watching FTV

santa was watching ftv
suddenly son come her...
santa = kitne gareeb ladkiya hai. kapde lene ke liye paise nhi hai.
son = papa agar enh se bhi gareeb dekhne ho to mere paas c.d hai.

Views : 192    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

Inteligent Santa

kamjor dil wale na padhen.....
.
.
boss- mere liye ak shisha le kar aao jisme main apna muh dekh sakun.......
.
.
.
.
santa- nahi mila sir!
sab me mera hi muh dikh raha hai.....
.
inteligent santa

Views : 144    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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santa-gf

santa ki gf romantic mood me santa se,
.
gf :- make me feel like a wife,
.
santa ne apne kapde utare or
.
.
.
.
.
kaha le saali dho k aa fata fat

Views : 200    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Army Training

army training k doran 1 officer ne sipahi se pocha: ye hath me kia hai?

sipahi santa: sir ye bandooq hai.

officer: ye bandooq nhi tumhari izzat or shan hai, tumhari maa hai maa!!

then officer to a sipahi banta singh: tumhare hathme ye kya hai?

banta: sir, ye santa ki maa hai or hamari aunty hai..!!

Views : 193    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

Hisaab baraabar.

1 bache ne santa ki dukan se rs.45
ka saaman liya or use 5 k note me
5 k aage pencil se 0 likh kr diya or
kaha ye lo 50rs.. or 5rs.
vapas do..
.
.
.
santa ko pata chal gaya or usne
socha iska badla lena chahiye..
.
.
usne jeb se 50 ka note nikala or
uska 0 pencil se kat diya r bola ye
le 5rs. ab to hisaab
baraabar.

Views : 217    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa ke lips jale hue the

banta: kaise jale?

santa: wife ko railway steation drop krne gaya tha.

banta: to?

.
.
.
santa: khushi ke mare.
train ke engine ko choom liya

Views : 153    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

Girl Friend Insult

लड़का लड़की facebook पे chatting कर रहे थे,
लड़की – ओये, क्या चल रहा है?
लड़का – वही जो तेरे पास नहीं है,
लड़की चिढ़ते हुए बोली -क्या ?
लड़का – दिमाग

Views : 302    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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Girl Super Insult

एक लड़के ने रात के अंधेरे में लड़की को छेड़ा,
अगले दिन-
लड़की की माँ- क्यों रे?
तूने मेरी लड़की को रात क्यों छेड़ा,
लड़का – आज सुबह जब उजाले में आपकी
लड़की को देखा तो मैंने भी खुद से यही सवाल किया,
माँ बेहोश

Views : 248    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

fighting

santa banta were fighting after exam.
sir: y r u fighting?
santa : this fool left the answer sheet blank,
sir: so what?
santa: even i did the same thing, now teacher will think that we both copied.

Views : 176    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

biwi ko padhaunga

biwi ko padhaunga
santa : pehle me apni biwi ko ba karwaunga fir ma fir phd karwaunga fir badiya si naukri dilwaunga.
banta : fir acha sa rishta dekh k uski shaadi bhi krwa diyo.

Views : 310    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Cricket Joke

Shahrukh , Rajini and Chiranjeevi at Cricket Match if our stars play cricket it would like this

shahrukh , rajini and chiranjeevi at cricket match if our stars play cricket matches it would go like this

chiranjeevi
cheeru, the batsman needs to score 10 runs of 1 ball…..... bowler bowls it and cheeru hits with tremendous power….... the ball goes far away and umpires are forced to give 12 runs for that.

cheeru wins the match!


shahrukh

shahrukh, the batsman needs to score 10 runs of 1 ball…..... bowler bowls it and shahrukh glides it to 3rd man…...... .....the ball goes to boundary line shahrukh runs for 3 runs, fielder throws at non-striker it misses the stumps and goes for over-throw, shahrukh runs again for 3 , this time fielder tactic fully throws at keepers end, keeper misses it goes for a 4 runs. in the background vande mathram….

shahruk wins the match!


rajinikanth

rajni the batsman needs to score 10 runs of 1 ball…

bowler bowls it and rajini hits with tremendous power….... the ball splits into “two” 1 half goes to six.....the other half goes to four.

rajini wins the match!

Views : 380    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Cricket Joke

introducing T20 Format In Exams

introducing t20 format in exams-

reduce exam time by 1 hr & marks by 50

introduce breaks after each 15 mins

1st 30 mins power play no teacher in d class

cheer girls in every class

they'll dance when we take additional sheets...

Views : 433    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
More Cricket Joke

why india won the cricket

why india won the cricket (quarter final world cup) match vs australia

virend(r)a
tendulk(a)r
yuvara(j)
gaut(a)m
rai(n)a
dhon(i)
virat (k)ohli
harbhaj(a)n
zaheer kha(n)
munaf pa(t)el
as(h)win

Views : 419    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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engineer

engineers are impossible, they can prove anything

prove 2 / 10 = 2


art student : out of syllabus


commerce student : question hi galat hai


medical student : its strange yaar, ye kaise ho sakta hai?


engineering student : it is very easy

two / ten

= wo / en

(w=23rd letter, o=15th letter,
e=5th letter & n=14th letter)

= 23+15 / 5+14

= 38 / 19

= 2

engineer never ask?

ans kya hai?

they only ask, ans kya lana hai.

that's engineering...

Views : 351    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 13 Oct 2015
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ek pyar bhara sms

1 admi ki dusre shehar me naukri lagi.
waha pahunch ke usne socha ki biwi ko sms kar doon.

galti se wo sms kisi aur ke paas chala gaya,

jis ke pass gaya wo aurat apne husband ko
dafna ke aayi thi or sms padthe hi behosh ho gayi.

sms kuch yun tha:

main yaha thik thak pahunch gaya hoon,
yaha mobile ki suvidha bhi hai,

tum udhas mat hona,
2-3 din me tumhe bhi apne paas bula lunga..

Views : 336    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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Dear friends Did you know

valentines originates from gujaratis.


when the gujarati men upset their wives,

the women beat their husbands up with a velan
( rolling pin used for making roti/ chapati)


this happened so often the practice came
to be known as velan time.
(beating time).

to escape the beatings the hubbies gave
flowers, sweets and gifts.

after many years and language translations,
it is now called as valentines around the world!

Views : 112    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

two GIRLS Were Playing Chess

girl 1: chal yaar bas karte hai... pak gaye hai.
girl 2: haan yaar... waise bhi tera sirf
haathi bacha hai aur mera sirf ghoda..

phir wahan ek ladka aata hai...

boy: chalo girls... chess khelte hain.

both girls: nahi! tum to hume aasani se hara doge.
boy: chalo yaar... tum dono aur mai akela.

both girls: phir bhi hum haar jayenge.
boy: okay... mai left hand se khelunga.

both girls: yupee... phir thik hai.

dono obviously haar jaate hai aur
ladka wahan se chala jaata hai.

girl 1: badi sharmnaak baat hai yaar...
left hand se bhi hara diya usne!
girl 2 (thoda sochne ke baad):

abe bewakoof bana gaya woh hume.
girl 1: kaise?
girl 2: wo lefty hi hoga...!

Views : 303    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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How long is your one?

how long is your one?

i have one.

you have one.

your mother uses your father's one

and your auntie uses your uncle's one.

a married lady would acquire one.

but a divorced lady would lose her one.

a pope does not use his one.

lee kuan yew has a short-short one.

mao ze dong had a hairy one.

arnold schwarzenneger has a longer one.

michael j. fox has a shorter one.

madonna does not have one.

the chinese usually have short ones.

while the indian usually have long ones.

do you have one?

how long is your one?

which one is your preferred one?

(see below for answer)

.


.


.


answer : your surname,( what were you

thinking of,)

huh???

Views : 111    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Cricket Joke

DO Vs DIE

ganguly: do or die.

sehwag: do before you die.

dravid: do until they die.

tendulkar: do that will never die...

laxman: do when everyone else die.

yuvraj: do, die, reborn, do, die, reborn (repeat)....

dhoni: do everything before luck die.

Views : 316    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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LIGHT AA Gai

pure india me sirf 2 state (up and bihar) hi aise hai jahan log har 2-3 hour mai khushiya manate hai .........

pata hai kaisey??

light aa gaii !!

light aa gaii !!


Views : 355    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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Ek din khuda ne mujhse kaha.

ek din khuda ne mujhse kaha,maang kuch apne liye;
mat ghoom tu is tarah ,bikhre tute sapne liye;
kyu parvaah is duniya ki behisaab tu karta hain,
jisne thode sapne tere,bus apne matlab ke liye;
khuda ki baato ko sunkar main thoda sa muskaya;
phir maine kaha us khuda se-
ki dena hain to ek choti si jagah de,
sirf uske dil me-bus mere liye

Views : 376    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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exam vs rockstar

in rockstar-'toote hue dil se hi
sangeet nikalta hai!!'....
.
.
.
.
.
in exams-'chhute hue chapter se hi questions nikalta hai!!

Views : 319    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Intellectual Joke

admi shadi kyu krta hai

admi shadi kyu krta hai?
marne k baad woh swarg mai jaye to acha feel kare ,aur nark mai jaye to apne ghar jaisa feel kare...

Views : 331    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

banta- ladkiya shrab se itna nafrat kyu krti hai?
santa- kyuki shrab pine k baad unk chuhe jaise
pati shero jaisa bartao krne lagte hai...

Views : 248    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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Santa ne theke k malik ko raat 1 bj phone kiya

santa ne theke k malik ko raat
1 bj phone kiya : bhaji theka kitne bj khulega
malik:swer 9 bj
1 ghnte baad,
fir santa ne fon kiya : bhaji theka kitne bj khulega
malik:swer 9wje
santa ne 3-4 war aisa hi kiya
5vi war malik gusse se bola tujhe kya chahiye
santa:kuch nhi bhaaji,
main theke k andar betha hu.mujhe ghar jana hai

Views : 329    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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santa

santa to his fatty wife: operation me mujhe kuch ho gya
to doctor se shadi kar lena
fatty wife: aisa kyu kah rahe ho?
santa: q ki badla lene ka yahi tarika he

Views : 251    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
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santa-banta

santa- dunia mein sab se dukhi aadmi koun hai ?
banta- panipuri wala !
santa- kaise?
banta- kyuki ladki kuwari ho ya married “bhaiya” hi bulati hai.

Views : 235    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

santa-judge

santa ko fasi sunakr juj bola akhri bar kise milna chahoge
santa- bv se
judge- ma bap se nhi
santa- ma-bap to agla jnm hote mil jaege,bv k lie 21 saal wait krna padega

Views : 205    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa: abe ye gaddaa khod ke mitti kaha dalu??

banta: abe itni bhi akal nahi hai tujhme?
dusra gaddha khod aur usme daal de..

Views : 187    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Intellectual Joke

diffrence between Seniors & Juniors

santa: whats diffrence between seniors & juniors?
banta: jo samundra k najdik rehte wo seniors (sea+nears)
&
jo zoo k najdik rehte wo juniors (zoo+nears)

Views : 275    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Pappu Joke

Choclate Milk

do u know why pappu bought a brown cow???
.
.
.
2 get choclate milk

Views : 342    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

ladka aur ladki

1 ladki ka college ke 1 ladke se chakkar tha
ladki-jaan tum mughe rani kyo kahte ho?
ladka haskar bola-kyoki nokarani kahna lamba ho jata hai
ladki- pta hai me tumko jaan kyo kahti hu?
ladka-kyo?
ladki-haskar boli-kyoki jaanwar kahna lamba ho jata hai

Views : 961    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Cricket Joke

MS DHONI

teacher: tell me the name of any
microsoft product?

samy:
ms excel..

johny:
ms word..

nitin:
ms powerpoint..

santa:
after thinking a lot....
.
.
.
.

.
.
.

ms dhoni...

Views : 446    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

vidhwa aurat

santa ka interview:
batao wo kaun si aurat h jisko
1oo\\% pata hota h ki uska husband kaha
hai?

santa ne apna khatarnak dimag lagaya
or bola
.
vidhwa aurat

Views : 393    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

bewkuf santa

santa girlfriend ko ghar le gaya
sab darwaze
khirkiyan
band kardi
light off kar ke
uske pass aaya aur bola:
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
ye
dekho meri watch me light jalti hai


Views : 277    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

banta aur Inspector

3 poultry farms ki inspection ho rhi thi...

inspector: tum murgion ko kya dete ho ?
banta: bajra

inspector: wrong food

arrest him

inspector: tum kya dete ho ?

banta's relative: rice

inspector: tum bhi galat ho

arrest him too

santa ghabra k bola: main to sab murgion ko 5-5 rupay de deta hu jis ka jo dil kare kha le...

Views : 286    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa

aurto se bhari bus palti
sari aurte mar gyi
sbke pati 1-1 ghanta roye
pr santa 2 ghante!
q?
.
qki snta ki wife se bus miss hogyi thi

Views : 244    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

Ground Staff vs santa

fighter pilot santa kamyabi k baad apna jahaaz land karne pe bohut khush hua..
.
.
niche utarne pe ground staff ne ussey hath milaya....

aur uski vardi utarne me help karne lage..
.
.
santa (fakr se): aaj maine pakistan ke 4 jahaaz, 2 helicopter or 1 tank ko mara hai..
.
.
ground staff: wo sab to theek hai lekin sir ji apne 1
galti kar di..
.
.
santa: kaun si galti.. ??
.
.
ground staff: bas aap isi khushi me pakistan me hi land kar gaye hain..

Views : 290    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

Interviewer-santa

railway interview:-interviewer:- agar do gaadiyan ek line pe aa gayi to kya karoge?
.
.
santa:- jee, red light dikhaunga.
.
.
.
interviewer:- red light na hoto?
.
.
santa:- torch dikhaunga..
.
.
interviewer:- torch naho to?
.
.
.
santa:- apni red shirt utaar kar dikhaunga.
.
.
.
interviewer:- shirt bhi red na huyi to?
.
.
santa:- fir main apne bua ke ladke ko bulaunga...
.
.
.
interviewer:- hain..!! wo kyun?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
socho socho ??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

santa:- jee, usne kabhi traino ki takkar nahi dekhi..


Views : 205    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa baraf ka tukda haath me lekar gour se dekh raha tha
banta- kya kar rahe ho? santa- dekh raha hu ki leak kaha se ho raha hai.

Views : 203    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa

santa ko chand par bhejne ka
faisla hua..
.
.
aadhe raste
jakar santa rocket se kood gaya or chillaya......
.
.
kamino aaj to amawasya hai,
chand to hoga hi nahi......


Views : 256    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa: what is difference between “complete and finish”?

banta: when you marry a right person you are complete
and when you marry the wrong one your are finished!!!

Views : 169    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-boss

mr. santa interview dene gaye..
boss-ur birthday.
santa-22 april sir.
boss-kaun sa saal.
santa-ulloo ke patthe,kya kon sa saal,


Views : 293    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa in court ( sad ) : bachpan mein agar maa ki
baat suni hoti to aaj ye din nahi dekhna padta
.
.
.
.
.
judge : kya kehti thi tumhari maa ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
santa : judge sahab tum bhi gawaaro wali baat
kar rahe ho...jab suni hi nahi to bataau kaise..

Views : 241    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa: meri wife mujhe naukar samajhne lagi hai
batao main kya karun?

banta: karna kya hai,
2-4 ghar aur pakad aur apna dhandha jama le.

Views : 197    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 12 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa to banta..
santa-: mere mama ne mujhse
choti si baat pe rishta tod
diya..
.
.
banta-: kyu..??
kya kaha unhone..?
.
.
.
santa-: unhone kaha
.
.
.
.
.
.
mungfali me dana nahi,
hum tumhare mama nahi..
hahahaha.

Views : 199    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-banta

santa ki umbrella mein hole tha.. to uske bete ne use pucha : papa chatri mein hole kyon?
.
.
.
.
.
.
santa : are gadhe agar barish rukegi to pata kese calega?

Views : 229    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa to banta :-
agr tu bata de ki meri tokri me kya h. toh
tokri k aadhe ande tere..aur ye bhi bata de ki
ande kitne h...
.
to 10 k 10 tere.... aur
.
agar ye bhi bata de ki ande kiske h...
.
to murgi bhi teri....
.
banta :- abey koi hint to de


Views : 214    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa on his 1st date

santa apni grlfrnd k saath 1st date pe : ye meri pehli date hai darling agr koi galti ya kami reh jaye toh chhota bhai samajh k maaf kr dena.

Views : 231    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa

santa sharab pikar
sadhu se takra gya
sadhu gusse me- aye murkh
me tujhe shraap deta hu
santa-rukiye maharaj
me glas leke ata hu

Views : 218    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa

santa jungle ke raste se ja raha tha.
tab uski najar ped pe latke hue sap pe padi.
santa :sirf latakne se height nahi badhegi,mummy ko bolo complain pilaye.

Views : 243    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa

santa kissed his gf in park
gf: plz ye sab shaadi se pehle maat karo
santa: oh soniye don't worry i'm married

Views : 104    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband-wife

wife: agar duniya mein aurat na hoti
to tumhare pant ke button kaun takta..???
.
.
.
.
.
.
husband: yadi duniya mein aurat na hoti to pant
pehnne ki jarurat hi kya thi..

Views : 216    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-Receptionist

santa makes call to airport: how long is the journey from punjab to america??
receptionist: 1 sec sir..
.
.
.
.
santa disconnects and says,
''pee ke bethi h kamini....

Views : 266    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa bank me paise jama karane gaya

santa bank me paise jama karane gaya.
cashier-
tumhare note nakli hai.
santa-
tujhe kya farak padata hai?
jama to mere account me ho rahe hai na..!!

Views : 250    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa: yaar tu itna bada ho gaya aur phir bhi abhi tak tere ko
dadhi- mooch nahi aayi?
banta :yaar main bilkul apni maa par gaya hoon

Views : 200    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa was busy scratching his head in a mall.
banta: wat happened?
santa: tu bhi kar,
wahan poster laga hai,
scratch & win a bmw

Views : 197    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 11 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

best joke

1936 ka best sms
us waqt mobile hi kaha tha
kabhi toh dimag use liya kro yar.

Views : 224    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 10 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

bus conductor

who is d most inspirational person after our
parents,..?
bus conducter
chaliye, chaliye,
aage badhiye
aage badhiye
aage badhte rahiye.

Views : 213    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 10 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

currency

pound, dinar, dollar etc have pictures of well dressed queens, kings, scientists, president etc on them
and rupee shows a half naked,malnouris hed old man..
saali currency hi gareebo wali hai, girni hi hai ...

Views : 212    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 10 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

easy physics

physics kitni easy hoti agar??
.
.
agar
..
apple' k jagah 'tree' gir gaya
hota!!!..to sala newton hi mar
jata...

Views : 236    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 10 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa:
tum bike itni tez q chla rhe ho?

banta:
ye letter urgent dena hai

santa:
kaha?

banta:
address padhne ka time nai hai.

santa:
ok go fast.!

Views : 299    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 9 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

danger moment

danger moment
when u call ur friend on his mobile nd say,
abe kamine, kha mar gya
and d ans is..
beta, wo to bahar gya hai..!! :

Views : 309    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 9 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

husband - wife

wife:- maine aap ki birthday ke liye itna mehnga suit lia hai ki bus…
husband:- shukar hai, mera bhi khayal aya, lao dikhao…?
wife:- “mai abhi pehen k ati hon”

Views : 216    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 9 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa ne ek din badi udasi se apne dost banta ko bola.

santa: “yaar meri biwi gussa bahut karti hai”

banta: “meri bhi pahle karti thi ab nahi karti”

santa: “achha, aisa tum ne kya elaaj kiya?” :o

banta muskurate hue: “kuch khas nahi, wo ek din gusse mein thi, maine kah diya ke budhape mein gussa aa hi jata hai, us din se wo gussa nahi karti“

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-ladka

santa ne beti ke room me cigarette dekha..
.
oh god, she smokes ;-o
.
fir wisky dekha..
.
oh god, she drinks
.
.
fir ladke ko dekha..
.
thank god, ye sab is ladke ka hai

Views : 178    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-teacher

teacher- jo mere sawal ka sahi jawab dega wo ghar ja sakta hai.

ussi waqt santa ne apna bag bahar fek diya.

teacher- wo bag kisne feka?

santa- maine..ab main ghar jau???

Views : 181    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

Sardar -biwi

biwi raat me kapde utrte hue...
tirchi nazar se santa ki traf dekte hue boli:
pata he na kya karna hai..?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
santa: teri aisi ki taisi,,,
me itni rat ko kpde nahi dhounga..!

Views : 182    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa-tu mirror k saamne baith kr q pad rha hai...
.
.
.
.
.
.
banta- iske 3 reason hain....
.
1. saath mein revision ho jaati hai
.
.
.
.
.
2. khud pr nazar rhti hai
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
3. padne k lie company mil jati hai

Views : 166    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa : o yaar car ki speed itni kyon
badha
di?
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
banta: o car ki break fail ho gayi hai,
accident ho jaye iske pehle ghar
pahunch jaate
hain….!

Views : 141    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-ladka

ek bar santa station pr train ka wait kr rha tha. tvi ek ladka usse time
puchta h.
ladka-- uncle tim kya h rha.h?
santa-- sorryy
ladka-- uncl time?
santa-- sorry ladka-- pr ku aap ni bta rhe h?
santa-- isliye ki agr mai time bta diya to tm mjhse mra naam puchoge.
fir bat badegi. hm dono dost ban jaynge. fir hm frank ho jayge. fir kya
pata hm dono ek hi station pr jaye. wha mri beti mjhe reciev krne
ayegi. tm mri beti se dosti kr loge jo bahuut sundr h. fir pyar kr loge. fir
mjhe shadi krne k liye dabao daloge. aur mai ye nhi chahta ki tm mre damad bano kuki tm bahut laparwah ho jiske hath me ek time btane
wali ghadi nhi h.
wo mra damad nhi ban sakta.
.
.
ladka sock hokr behosh ho jata h.

Views : 204    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Pappu Joke

Pappu-wife

pappu: dekho.. main chahe jaisa bhi hoon..
par baccha ek dum sunder hona chahiye..
wife: dekho ji.. choice is yours.. baccha yaa
toh sunder hoga yaa aap ka hoga

Views : 238    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Rajinikanth Joke

diwali

breaking news...
nasa is closed..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
..
.
rajnikant bought all the rockets for the diwali….

Views : 318    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

couple

ek couple ek art gallery me paintings dekh rahe the..
wife ne dekha ke husband ka dhyan sirf ek hi painting pe hai jo ek ladki ki thi jiski body patto (tree leaves) se dhaki hui thi
wife ne apne husband se kaha: ghar chalna hai, yaa hawa chalne ka wait kar rahe ho?

Views : 285    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

Titanic

ek auto rickshaw me couple kiss
kar rhe the..........
driver unhe dekh raha tha
aage jaake accident hua
toh..
driver sar pakad kar baitha aur
bola:-
saala ab samjhaa titanic kyu dooba tha

Views : 267    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

aadmi ka dil

aadmi ka dil bahut bada hota hai,
aur aurat ka bahut chhota dil hota hai proof.
aurat k dil me
sirf uske lover aur pati k liye hi jagah hoti hai.
but aadmi ka dil
itna bada hota hai ki usme
lover
dost ki lover
biwi ki dost
saamne wali
bajuwali
uparwali
neechewali
sabjiwali
doodhwali
kapdewali
saali
kaamwali
bhai ki saali
aur
thodi bahut
patni k liye bhi
jagah hoti hai.
sach me, aadmi ka dil samundar hota hai..

Views : 253    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

cycle

cycle wale ne 1 aadmi ko takkar mar di
aur bola - aap bahut lucky ho
aadmi - kaise
cycle wala - aaj meri chutti hai
nahi to mai truck chalata hu.

Views : 211    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

pati-patni

pati : kaha ja rahe ho?

patni: jahannam me.......

pati: thank you, jao..........

Views : 240    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

Bibi-sohar

kya larki thi...
shohar: kal mere khuab main ek larki aai thi,
wah! kya larki thi.

bibi: akeli he aai hogi?

shohar: tumko kese pata:

bibi: uska husband mere khuab main
tha.

Views : 285    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-murgewala

santa murga kharidne gaya

santa: “murge kitne rs ke hai?”

murgewala: “70, 50 aur 10 rs ka”

santa: “10 rs ka itna sasta kyu?”

murgewala: “isko aids hai”

santa: “yehi de de, maine khana hi hai kaunsa g maarni hai“

Views : 256    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Cricket Joke

ipl

sarfaraz khan 17 ki umar me ipl khel raha h aur mai jab 17 ka tha tb mere exms hone ki wajh se ghr wale ipl dekhne nai dete the.

Views : 314    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

girl-boy

girl: sports me interest hai?
boy: haan
girl: cricket?
boy: haan
girl: football
boy: haan
girl: waise karte kya ho?
boy: satta khelta hoon.

Views : 306    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 8 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

Monsoon Special

monsoon special
a man was walking in the rain
lady: ap mera chata (umbrella) share kar sakte hai..
man: nai behenji, mai thiq hu
moral: moral voral kuch nai, piche biwi aarahi thi

Views : 219    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

male logic

male logic
lady: kya tum beer pite ho?
man: haa
lady: kitni pii lete ho ek din me?
man: yahi koi 2 beer ek din me
lady: kitne ki aati hai ek beer
man: rs. 100/-
lady: kab se pite aarahe ho?
man: karib 20 saal se
lady: ek din ka 200, matlab monthly 6000, yaane 20 saal me karib 15lakh...tum jante ho, agar sahi tarah kharch karte aur paise bachaate to itne paiso me tum ek honda city le sakte the
man: sahi tarah kharch??? madam kya ap beer piti hai?
lady: nai..
man: kaha hai apki honda city????

Views : 266    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

thought of the day

jab tak zinda hun post karta rahunga,
aur jis din post na kya to samajhlena,
agle din kardunga,
maar do zalimo,
nahi nahi maar do........

Views : 211    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

bhaghwaan in dabang mood

bhagwaan dabang mood me:
hum tumhari city me aisa climate kar denge k confuse ho jaaoge ke cold cream lagaye ya sunscreen...

Views : 245    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

Reactions of kiss in different country

reactions of kiss in different country
america: kiss hard
japan: kiss me slowely
but in india: jaldi kro nhi to koi aa jayega

Views : 200    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

teacher -baccha

school me bacche ke admission k liye interview tha
teacher: beta papa kya krte hai
baccha: jo mummy bolti hai!!!!

Views : 228    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Latest Joke

santa-pandit

santa: aap mujhe sanskrit seekha do,

pandit: kyun?

santa: devtaao ki bhasha hai, swarg mein jaroorat padegi

pandit: agar nark gaye to?

santa: punjabi to aati hi hai…

Views : 166    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa roti ka ek bite khud kha raha tha aur ek paas baithi murgi ko khila raha tha…

banta: “ye kya kar raha hai?”

santa- “chicken ke sath roti kha raha hu.”

Views : 179    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

pati-patni

ati patni mein zabardast jhagda ho raha tha,

patni: kash main apni mom kibaat maan leti aur tum se shadi na karti

pati: kya matlab? tumhari maa ne mujh se shadi karne ko mana kiya tha?

patni: haan, bahut baar…

pati rote hue bola: hey bhagwan, main aaj tak uss nek aurat ko kitna bura samjhta raha jisne mujhe bachana chaha…

Views : 208    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

pati-biwi

pati: aaj khane me kya banaogi?
biwi: jo tum kaho…

pati: daal chawal banao
biwi: abhi kal hi to khaye the

pati: to sabji bana lo
biwi: bahcche nahi khate

pati: fir keema?
biwi: mujhe allergy hai

pati: parantha?
biwi: raat ko paranthe kaun khata hai?

pati: kadhi?
biwi: dahi nahi hai

pati: fir kya banaogi?
biwi: jo tum kaho!

Views : 229    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

thought of the day

“apni khud ki galatiyo par hansna aapki umra badha sakta hai!”
– shakespeare

“apni biwi ki galatiyo par hansna aapki umra ghata bhi sakta hai!”
– shakespeare ki biwi

Views : 200    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

pati-patni

shaadi ki function chal raha tha..

pati apni patni ke sath waha pahuncha,
thodi der baad patni ne dekha ki wo kisi mahila se hans-hans kar baat kar raha hai..

patni ne paas aakar kaha: main ghar pahunch kar, tumhari garam paani ki sikaayi kar ke iodex laga dungi!!

pati: par mujhe chot kaha lagi hai?

patni: abhi hum ghar bhi kaha pahunche hain?

Views : 244    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

indian wife

indian wife sanskaro wali hoti hai
wo kabhi sabke samne apne pati ko

“abe gadhe” aur
“oye gadhe” ya
“sun gadhe”

nahi bolti

isliye wo short me
“a.g. / o.g./ suno g” kehti hain..

Views : 204    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

Assistant-Boss

assistant: “sir, aap office mein shadi-shuda aadmiyon ko hi kyu rakhte ho?”

boss: “kyunki unhe beizzati sehne ki aadat hoti hai aur ghar jane ki jaldi bhi nahi hoti”

Views : 168    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

Mere Garam Pani

bhari sardi mein biwi bathroom se naha ke nikli to uska pati use ghoor raha tha!

biwi romantic hokar boli: kya iraada hai?

pati ne 2 thappad maare aur bola “mere garam pani se kyu nahayi”

Views : 208    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

wife-operator

wife ambulance ko 108 per call karti hai.

operator: aapko kya samasya hai?
wife: mere pair ki ungli coffee table se takra gayi hai.

operator: haste hue aur iske liye aap ambulance bulana chahati hain.
wife: nahi, ambulance to mere pati ke liye hai, use hasna nahi chahiye tha naa..

Views : 201    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Husband Wife Joke

husband-wife

husband: meri shirt ulti karke press karna.
wife: ok.

after 10 minutes

husband: meri shirt press ki?
wife: nahi…

husband: kyun?
wife: ulti nahin aa rahi hai!

Views : 188    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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spelling mistake

a man received message from his neighbor..

sorry sir i am using your wife.
i am using day and night,
i am using when you are not present at home,
infact i am using more than you are using,
i confess this because now i feel very much guilty,
hope you will accept my sincere apologies!!

man went home and had a big fight with his wife.

few minutes later he received another message…

sorry sir spelling mistake… it’s not wife but wifi !!

Views : 263    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Tote-toti

ek pinjare mein kuchh tote (parrots) ek toti ko chhed rahe the..

jabki doosre pinjare mein ek tota pooja aur dusra tota namaaz padh raha tha!

malik ne socha: kitne nek tote hain, inke pinjare mein toti surakshit rahegi.

usne toti ko nek toto ke pinjare mein daal diya.

to pooja karne wala tota namaaz padhne wale tote se bola…

“utho miyaan dua kabool ho gayi!”

Views : 193    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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ladka vs ladki

ek ladka ek ladki ko cafe mein akele baitha dekh kar ladki ki table par gaya aur kaha:

ladka: kya main aap ke saath baith sakta hoon?
ladki (chillai): nahin, main aaj raat tumhare saath nahin guzaar sakti… !

sab log dekhne lage….. ladka sharminda ho gaya..

kuch der baad ladki uske paas gayi aur maafi mangi aur kaha: main human nature ke upar study kar rahi hoon aur padh rahi hoonke log sharminda ho kar kya mehsoos karte hain…
ladka (chillaya): what…?? 10 hazar ek raat ke bahut zyada hain, kuch kam karo yaar…

sab log ladki ko dekhkar hasne lage. .

aur phir ladka aahista se bola: ab kar study human nature pe

Views : 170    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Bacha-Baap

bacha:- bhagwan kare teacher ki zuban cut jaye. roz roz dant ti hai.

next day zuban cut gayi..

bacha :- bhagwan kare master ka hath toot jaye. tang karta hai… bahut marta hai.

next day master ka hath toot jata hai…

bacha :- bhagwan mere baap ko utha le… bahut marte hai.

next day baap ghar aate hain,

bacha :- papa apko kuch nahi hua ??

baap :- nahi kyon?

bacha :- maa kahan hain…??

baap :- pados me sharma uncle ki death ho gayi hai, wahan gayi hai..

Views : 174    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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age factor

age factor
age 1 to 15 : naino mai sapna.

15 to 25 : sapno mai sajna.

25 to 35 : sajna pe dil aa gaya .

35 to 75 : kyu sajna pe dil aa gaya?

Views : 229    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Teacher vs Kapil

teacher: paani mein rehne wale 5 jaanwar ke naam batao?

kapil: mendak.

teacher: 4 aur batao…

kapil: mendak ki mummy, uske papa, uski behan aur uski item

Views : 212    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Santa vs Bhikari

bhikari- sahab 20 rs do na, coffee peeni hai..

santa- lekin coffee to 10 rs ki aati hai?

bhikari- meri girlfrnd bhi sath mai hai na.

santa- arey, bhikari hokar tune girlfriend bana rakhi hai..

bhikari- nahi, gf ne hi mujhe bhikari banaya hai..

Views : 159    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa-banta

santa: pados me kya chal raha hai?

banta: birthday hai

santa: kiska?

banta: tuyu ka

santa ne puchha: tuyu!! ???

banta: haan, sunai to kuchh aisa hi de raha hai… “happy birthday tuyu!”

Views : 146    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs tapori

santa was going on a bike with his beautiful wife .

tapori : sardarji , wife hai ya lover ?

santa: saale lover hogi teri, meri to wife hai….

Views : 179    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs wife

santa do cigarettes ek saath peeta thaa.

wife: ek sath do cigarette kyon peete ho?

santa: dost kee yaad aati hai na … ek meri hoti hai aur ek mere dost kee…

kuchh dino baad santa ek hi cigarette peene laga…

wife – dost ko bhool gaye kya?

santa : nahin pagli, maine cigarette peena chhod diya hai!!

Views : 135    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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ramu ne apne aap ko aaine me dkha

ramu ne daru pike apne apko aaine
me dekha...
~
or
~
~
bola
~
yaara isko to kahi dekha h
o yaad aaya ye to wahi kamina h....
jo shadi k album me teri bivi k sath
tha.????????

Views : 135    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs dukandar

santa mobile recharge karwane gaya
dukandar-- kitne kaa??
santa-- 10 rs ka kar do
dukandar-- 7 rs ka talktime milega.
santa- koi baat nahi, 3 rs ki namkin de do..

Views : 138    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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ladki vs lecturer teacher

ek ladki lecture bunk kar ke college mein ghum rahi thi
ek professor ne use dekha aur pucha: “ye kya? chalu period mein ghum rahi ho?”
ladki ne sharmate hue jawab diya: “sir, ye soch hi to badalni hai“

Views : 136    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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ek naai ki dukaan

ek naai ki dukaan ke upar ghar tha
ek din ghar ki ek aurat ne bahar ki taraf apni sadi sukhne ke liye dali
dukan mein andhera ho gaya to naai ne jor se awaaz lagayi
naai: “bhabhi ji, sadi uper utha lo mene baal kaatne hai“

Views : 120    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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pati vs patni

pati:-aaj main sabha pati banunga.
patni:-khabardaar jo aap mere alawa kisi aur ke pati bane.

Views : 125    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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pati vs patni

patni: aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
pati: tum bhi to kitni moti ho gayi ho.
patni: main to maa banne wali hoon!
pati: main bhi to baap banne wala hoon


Views : 129    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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pappu vs teacher

teacher: “maine ek aadmi ka khoon kiya”
iss sentense ko future tense mein badlo.

.

.

pappu: “you will go to jail”

Views : 150    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Intellectual Joke

For Boys and girl

for boys:

way 2 impress a girl

respect her,
honour her
love her,
protect her and
care for her

but
for girls :

how 2 impress a boy

just smile :-)

Views : 214    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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pati vs patni

patni : suno ji, bus me aapko logo ne itna kyon mara?
pati : are mera ek photo bus main ek aurt ke pair ke niche gir gaya tha aur mene kaha
madam zara pair uper kijiye photo lena hai….

Views : 180    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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pati vs patni

pati:-main jeevan main aaj jo kuch bhi bana hoon,apne aap bana hoon.
patni:-lo, main aaj tak bekar hi bhagwaan ko kosti rahi.

Views : 179    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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pati vs patni

patni:-sharab peene ke baad kya tumhe mera naam bhi yaad nahin rehta?
pati:-pee lene ke baad to main har gam bhool jata hoon,meri jaan.


Views : 143    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Ghalib vs girl

ghalib ne girlfriend ko date par bulaya, wo late aayi….

girl: am i late ?

ghalib: arz hai….

falak pe chand sitaron ko neend aa rahi hai,

dusri ka time ho gaya hai, tu ab aa rahi hai.

Views : 147    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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2 dost

2 dost
2 dost jungle mein ja rahe the,

jab raat ho gayi to wo dono raaste mein hi tent laga ke so gaye.

raat ko 1 dost ki aankh khuli..

usne doosre ko jaga ke kaha
aasman ki taraf dekh ke bata tujhe kya nazar aata hai?

2nd : bahut saare sitare..

1st : isse kya pata chalta hai?

2nd : aasman khubsurat hai..

1st : abey newton ki aulad tent chori ho gaya hai…!

Views : 149    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

banta: jalebi bech raha tha,
lekin bola raha tha.. “aaloo le lo aaloo”
santa: yeh to jalebi hai..
banta : abe chup ho ja, warna makkhiya aa jayegi!


Views : 186    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs bijli

santa par bijli ka taar gir gaya
santa tadap-tadap ke marne hi wala tha ki
achanak…
use yaad aaya ki bijli to 2 din se band hai..
wapas uthkar, hanste hue bola,
aailaa..
yaad nahin aata to mar hi jaata!


Views : 167    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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the 2 lady

the 2 lady
1st lady: patni har janam me wahi pati kyun chahti hai?
2nd lady: taaki uss pati ko sudharne me lagi mehnat bekaar na jaaye

Views : 135    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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mom vs pappu

mom – pappu beta.. haath jal gaya,
jara tooth paste lana..

pappu – nahin maa,
mere tooth paste me namak hai,
duniya wale sochege,
bete ne jale pe namak chhidak diya…

Views : 151    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
More Girls-Boys Joke

Boy vs Girl

boy- bus,train or ladki ek jesi hoti hai,ek jati hai to dusri aa jati hai
girl- taxi, autoriksha or ladke ek jaise hote hai, ek bulao 4 chale
aate hai..!

Views : 205    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Pitaji vs Tinku

pitaji:- itne kam no. ? do thapad marne chahiye!
tinku:- ha papa,chalo maine us mastarji ka ghar dekha hai!!

Views : 181    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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judwa baache

do judwa baache kamare me baithe the
ek haans ke lot pot ho raha tha aur dusra udaas tha
dad : tum itna kyun haans rahe ho
son : mummy ne itni thand me dono baar isi ko nehla diya!

Views : 166    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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teacher vs santa

teacher : santa! make a sentence using “neither-nor”.
santa : when girls wear tight fitting dresses, “neither” are they
comfortable, “nor” are we!

Views : 127    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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prove 4=5

a funny theorem in mathematics :
can you prove, 4=5
yes it is true, here is the proof :
for this, we take three variable a, b and c.

suppose, if :
a + b = c
we can also write the same in this way :
5a – 4a + 5b – 4b = 5c – 4c
=> 5a – 5b – 5c = 4a + 4b + 4c
=> 5 * (a+b+c) = 4 * (a+b+c)
=> 5=4 or 4=5

Views : 119    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Colgate vs HARPIC

colgate se daant saaf karne ka,
pepsodent se majboot karne ka,
babool se fresh karne ka..
agar fir bhi safed nahi huye to..
bindass harpic use karne ka..

Views : 225    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Boyz Mentality

boyz mentality :-

ye jo aag dim me lagi hai zamane me laga dunga,

.
..
…

uski doli jo uthi,

to

koi baat nahi smart hoon dusri pata loonga…;)

Views : 154    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

santa – yaar banta tune poore toilet me potty kyu kar di?
banta – yaar ye mobile bhi na!
santa – kya hua?
banta – tune “idea” ka ad nahi dekha
“walk when u talk”

Views : 157    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs man

after a big accident, a man was crying : o god! i have lost my lef hand?
santa : control yourself my friend. don’t cry. see that man. he has lost
his head. is he crying?


Views : 88    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Santa vs Ladki

santa (ladki ko chedte hue): hor soniya ki haal he…??
ladki (gusse me) boli: jo teri behn ka hai.
santa (hans kar): woh to pregnant hai!!!

Views : 177    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

santa: yaar tumne college ana q chhor diya?

banta: yaar actually mere
papa kehta hai ke
ak jagah bar bar jane se
izzat kam ho jati hai....
hahahaha...

Views : 146    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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samta vs banta

ek bus accident hua
banta:haye mera paoon
santa :chilla kyun raha hai dekh vo mar gaya hai phirbhi chup-chap leta hai

Views : 142    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs wife

wife to santa : “you don’t love me at all”
santa points towards their five children and says
“do you think i donwloaded them from google”

Views : 90    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

santa : tumhari biwi ka kya naam hai?
banta : google kaur.
santa : ye kaisa naam hai?
banta : yaar mein jaha bhi hota hoon, wo mujhe dhoondh hi leti hai!

Views : 188    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

santa mango juice ka glaas le kar baitha tha
banta aaya aur fataak se juice pee gaya.
santa – meri to yaar kismat hi kharab hai. beta fail ho gaya,
biwi dost ke saath bhag gayi, ghar me chori ho gayi, nalke me
paani nahi, ghar me light nahi.
aab juice me zehar daal ke peene ko rakha tha
aur wo bhi tu pee gaya saale!

Views : 177    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

banta : what is the similarity between marriage and 11:59 pm?
santa : dono ke baad 12 bajte hai aur din badal jate hai!

Views : 168    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

santa ko rota dekhkar banta ne pucha kya hua?
santa : meine 2 ton ka ac kharida,
ghar aakar tola to sir 35 kilo ka nikla!

Views : 144    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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husband vs wife

wife: shadi ke pehle to tum mujhe rose gift diya karte they,
ab kyun nahi dete?
husband: machhali pakdne ke baad bhi kya koi chara dalta hai!

Views : 186    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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Wife - Begum

wife ko begum kyon kehte hai?
ans: kyonki shadi ke baad sare gum to husband
se hisse mein aate hai,
aur biwi be-gum ho jai hai!!!

Views : 159    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 7 Oct 2015
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TV vs Biwi

jitne channel tv ke,
utne nakhre biwi ke,
tv chalta hai remote se,
biwi chalta hai note se.

Views : 164    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Sardar vs singer

sardar ke radio me kuch problem ho gayi to aur kharab ho gaya
usne radio khol kar dekha to ek mara hua chuha mila
ye dekh kar sardar gussa ho gaya aur bola : ye chalega kaise?
sala singer hi mara pada hai

Views : 144    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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sardar vs banta

ek chor sardar jee k mobile ko lekar bhar raha tha. sardar hasne laga banta : wo tumhare mobile ko lekar bhag raha hai aur tum hans rahe ho. sardar : bhagne do, charger to mere paas hai!

Views : 153    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Nurse vs Santa

nurse : mubarak ho aap ke ghar ladka paida hua hai.
santa : wah g wah kya technology hai, biwi meri hospital hai, aur bacha mere ghar paida hua hai!!!

Views : 153    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Wife vs Sardar

a sardar had a baby after 3 months of marriage. he suspected
and asked to his wife, “ye 3 month me hi baccha kaise hua?”

wife replied : tumhari shaadi ko kitne din hue?
sardar : three months

wife : aur meri shaadi ko?
sardar : 3 months.

wife : aur bacha kitne month ke baad?
sardar : 3 months.

wife : total kitne months hue?
sardar : oye 9 months & start dancing balle balle!!!!

Views : 162    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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baacho ke MAMU

jo dete hai ladki ko tohfe,
wo late hai unki shaadi me sofe,

jo jate hai unke piche,
wo aate hai caro ke neeche,

jo kehte hai jaanu,
wahi bante hai baacho ke mamu!!!

Views : 148    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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policeman vs Beta

a policeman to his son : tumhara result aacha nahi aaya.
aaj se tumhara khelna aur tv dekhna band.

beta : ye 50 rupay pakdo aur ess baat ko yaheen dabado

Views : 116    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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sardar vs Doctor

sardar to doctor: jab mein sota hu to mere sapne me monkeys football khelte hai.
doctor: koi baat nahi ye medicine sone se pehle kha lena.
sardar: kal se khaonga, aaj to final hai!!!


Views : 118    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
More Santa-Banta Joke

santa vs banta

santa : yaar aaj mein bus ke peeche peecha daudkar three rupees bacha liye.
banta : kya yaar, tum to bahut murkh ho, agar taxi ke peeche bhagte to 100 rupees bachta!


Views : 146    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Mareez vs Doctor

mareez:maine bohut dinse cigarette chodne ke liee kosis karta hu magar agar nahi krparta hu.

doctor:jaldi se petrol pump par koi job le lo.

Views : 146    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Mareez vs Doctor

patient doctor ko bola --> doctor sahab mujhe dur ka nazar nahi ata hai..

doctor na kaha-- > wo asmaan par kia hai?

mareez --> wo suraj hai

doctor > aabay andhay is s e duur kia khudha ko dekhaga keya..!

Views : 135    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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12 Boys planed

12 boys planed to propose a girl

10 came with a rose..
but 1 came with a ring – thats confidence

but what about the other 1?
wo sala baraat lekar aaya – over confidence!

Views : 124    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Romantic but real Fact

romantic but real fact…

jo aankho se rehte hai door…
.

..

…

jo aankho se rehte hai door…

..

…

woh questions exams me aate hai zaroor…!


Views : 158    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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GAAJAR vs Khargosh

ek khargosh roj lohaar ki dukan pe jata aur kehta : gaajar hai?
lohar inkar kar deta.

ek din lohaar ko gussa aaya aur usne khargosh ke daant tod diye.

fir..

fir kya…

agle din khargosh aaya aur bola…

gaajar ka juice hai kya???


Views : 155    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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this is a classic

this is a classic ::

santa ne facebook pe apna account banaya
aur apni wall pe likha :

“yaha thukna mana hai”
****************************************

Views : 132    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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once more

ek jagah sangeet ki mahfil chal rahi thi.ek gayak ne jaise hi gana gaya ,
sab bole , “once more”.gayak ne gana phir suna diya. sab log phir se bole ,
“once more”.gayak nephir se ganae suna diya.abki baar phir sab bole ,
“once more”.gayak ne kaha,”mere pyare sunne walo,
main aapka mere liye pyaar samajhta hu,
per meri bhi kuch maryada hai,main itni baar nahin ga sakta.”
tabhi mahfil main se ek aadmi bola,”jab tak tum thik se nahin gaaoge,
tumko gana padega.”

Views : 128    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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girl vs shopkeeper

girl- ye wishper kitne ka hai?
shopkeeper- ji 200 ka
girl- sahi laga doge
shopkeeper- ji lagaana aapko khud hi padega.

Views : 154    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Teacher vs Student

teacher – bolo a for apple ,
student – a for apple,
teacher – jor se bolo,
student – jai mata dee!!


Views : 111    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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old vs new

old : pehla pehla pyar hai, aayi bahar hai, aaja more sajan tera
intazar hai.
new : duja teja pyar hai, dil bekarar hai, aaja mere sajana verna
chautha taiyaar hai…!


Views : 121    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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shrabi vs bhaghwan

1 shrabi roz shiv mandir pe sir tekta tha.
1 din pujaari ne shiv ke jagah ganesh murti rakhi,
shraabi aya dekha bola- chhotu papa se bolna main aya tha.


Views : 139    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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pita vs son

pita:agar tu is baar bhi fail ho gaya to mujhe pita mat kehna.
kuch din bad
pita:kya hua tere result ka?
son:sorry yaar ram prasad mai fail ho gaya.


Views : 143    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Teacher vs Student

teacher-tum bde hoker kya karoge
student-shadi..
teacher-nahi, mera matlab hai kya banoge
student-dulha..
teacher-oho,i mean bade hoker kya hasil karoge
student-dulhan!

Views : 125    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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Mareez vs Doctor

mareez:-doctor ,mujhe ek serious bimari hai,main jo kuch bhi bolta hoon bhool jata hoon.
doctor:-aapko ye bimaari kab se hai?
mareez:-kaun si bimaari?

Views : 114    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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teacher vs bachcha

teacher:-bachcho kabhi sharab mat peena,jhooth mat bolna,kabhi nonveg mat khana,kabhi ladki ko mat chhedna.aur apne desh ke liye jaan de dena.
ek bachcha:-de denge sir,sala aisi zindagi se to marna achcha hai.


Views : 116    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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librarian vs aadmi

ek aadmi librarian se:-mujhe aatmhatya karni hai.kya aap mujhe aatmhatya per koi achchi book de sakte hain.
librarian:-nahin bilkul nahin,mujhe pata hai aap mujhe wo wapas nahin denge.


Views : 125    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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ladka vs ladki

ek ladka ek ladki ke saath baitha tha,
doosre din doosri ladki ke saath baitha tha,
teesre din teesri ladki ke saath baitha tha…
is kahani se shiksha milti hai:-ladkiyan badal jaati hain,ladke nahin.


Views : 123    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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malik vs naukar

maalik:-are raamu aaj tumne roti main kitna saare ghee laga diya..
naukar:-are saahab maaf karna shayad galti se maine apni roti aapko de di hai,



Views : 114    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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mummy vs baby

chota baby- mummy raat ko jab me susu karne gaya to bathroom
ki light jal gayi,
mummy- haramjade tu aaj fir freeze me susu kar aaya…!!


Views : 123    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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aadmi vs bhagwan

ek baar aadmi ne bhagwan se kaha,
“aapne aurat ko itna sundar kyon banaya hai?”
bhagwan bole,”taki tum unse pyaar kar sako.”
aadmi bola, “ to phir unhe itna bevkoof kyon banaya hai?”
bhagwan ne jawab diya, “taki wo tumse pyaar kar sake.”



Views : 110    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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aadmi vs bhagwan

ek aadmi bhagwaan se bola, “india se u.s.a tak pakki sadak banwa dijiye.”
bhagwan bole, “mushkil hai kuch aur maang lo.” aadmi bola,
“to phir aap meri biwi ko samajhdaar aur aagyakari bana dijiye.”
bhagwan bole, “sadak single banana hai ya double.”

Views : 117    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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murgi vs anda

ek murgi market gayi, aur dukaandar se boli, “ek anda dena.”
dukaandar bola, “sharm nahin aati, murgi hokar anda mangti ho.”
murgi boli, “mere pati ne kaha hai ki 3 rupyee ke ande ke liye
apna figure kharab mat karo.”


Views : 139    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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raja vs rani

raja or rani ne fix kiya ki ab baat mobile se nhi kabutar se karenge.1 din rani ne bina khat k kabutar uda diya.raja bola:
ye kya?
rani boli miss call yaar.


Views : 127    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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police vs man

police: did you know drinking and driving is aganist the law?
man: then why is there parking lots at the bar?
(police is speachless)

Views : 101    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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mom vs kid

kid: can i have a5 million dollars mommy?
mom: money doesn't grow on trees!
kid: what is money made out of?
mom: paper..
kid: what is paper made of?
mom: wood..
kid:where does wood from?
mom: trees..
kid: see money does grow on trees!
mom: ...
kid: so ... where's my money at?????

Views : 101    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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excellent answers

question : what is love and explain in details ?.........(40 marks)

usa's student.......
answer: love is life.
(marks : 10 from 40)

uk's student......
answer : love is pain.
(marks : 10 from 40)

indian student........answer :
.
definition:
a serious disorder of heart due to relationship between men & women that can cause death of 1 or both depending on the resistance associated

- types:
1 sided & 2 sided

- age:
usually occurs in teenages but nowdays can be found in any age

- symptoms:
tension
daydreaming
insomnia
phone addiction

- diagnosis by:
diary
photos
mobile

-treatment:
anti-love therapy by father's shoe
or
mother's sandal......

(marks 40 from 40) excellent !

Views : 103    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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read loud

read this out loud:
this is this cat
this is is cat
this is how cat
this is to cat
this is keep cat
this is an cat
this is idiot cat
this is busy cat
this is for cat
this is forty cat
this is seconds cat
now read the third word in all the sentences.

Views : 98    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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boy vs girl

before marriage:
boy: ah at last. i can hardly wait.
girl: do you want me to leave?
boy: no don't even think about it.
girl: do you love me?
boy: of course. always have and always will.
girl: have you ever cheated on me?
boy: never. why are you even asking?
girl: will you kiss me?
boy: every chance i get.
girl: will you hit me?
boy: hell no. are you crazy?
girl: can i trust you?
boy: yes.
girl: darling!
after marriage: (read from bottom to top)

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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boy vs girl

boy: hey wanna see a movie with me tonight?
girl: i have a boyfriend.
boy: and i have a math test tomorrow.
girl: what does that have to do with anything?
boy: i thought we were listing things we were going to cheat on.

Views : 193    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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great idea

teacher: did you finish you homework?
kid: did you finish grading my test?
teacher: i have other children's tests to grade
kid: i have other teachers homework to do

Views : 105    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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girl vs boy

boy : marry me.. ?
girl: do you have a house..?
boy : no..
girl: do you have a bmw car.. ?
boy : no..
girl: how much is your salary.. ?
boy : no salary.. but,..
girl: no but. you have nothing.. how can i
marry you.??
leave please.!
boy: (talk to himself) i have one villa, 3
property lands, 3 ferrari, 2porsche.. why i
still need to buy bmw.?! how can i get the
salary when actually i am the boss..

Views : 172    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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boy vs girl

boy: the principal is so dumb!
girl: do you know who i am?
boy: no...
girl: i am the principal's daughter!
boy: do you know who i am?
girl: no...
boy: good! *walks away*

Views : 165    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 6 Oct 2015
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solid insult

police: where do u live?
me: with my parents
police: where does ur parents live?
me: with me
police: where do u all live?
me: together
police: where is ur house?
me: next to my neighbors house
police: where is your neighbors house?
me: if i tell you u wont believe me.
police: tell me
me: next to my house

Views : 164    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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10 facts

i know 10 facts about you:
fact 1: you are reading this.
fact 2: you can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips.
fact 3: you just tried it.
fact 4: you're smiling.
fact 6: you're smiling or laughing again.
fact 7: you didn't notice i missed fact 5.
fact 8: you just checked it.
fact 9: you're smiling again.
fact 10: you like this

Views : 142    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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discoverer of england

teacher : pappu, go to the map and find england.

pappu : here it is!



teacher : correct. now, class, who discovered england?

class : pappu!

Views : 194    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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new technology

ek aadmi apne naak se aawaj nikal k kehta h ki mera phone bj rha h. its new technology.
dusra aadmi awaj apne neck se nikal k kehta h ki meri watch alarm di h. its new technology.
ye sb dekh kr tisra admi presan ho jata h or wo apne pichwade se paddu kr k kehta h mera fax aa rha h its new technology.

Views : 235    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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girl vs boy

girl: oye ladke tu kha ja rha h.
boy: hanging garden chalegi kya.
moral paise wale boys dikhe nhi ki ladkiya aa gyi bhikh mangne.

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

ek baar santa nha rha tha kisi ne uska kapda chura liya aur banta bahar se awaj de kr bola mujhe bhi nahana h tu jldi nikal phir bechera santa tisue paper body pr lapet kr bahar aaya.

Views : 208    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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Kharab sangat ka asar

wife: raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye thay.



husband: kya bataoon, sab galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Views : 243    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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Doubt about Mahabharata

in a remote village of india, once masterji is teaching the mahabharat katha to class 6 students. he is at the ‘krishna janma’ part of it.

masterji : “kansa heard the akashwani that his sister’s 8th child is going to kill him. he was furious. he ordered to put vasudev and devki behind the bars. first son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning… second one is born n kansa throws him off the mountain peak. third one is born…



ramu : i have a doubt (sounding nervous and confused).

masterji : “ramu bete, whole india does not have doubt in mahabharata then how come you have one?”

ramu : masterji, if kansa knew that devaki’s 8th child was going to kill him, “why the hell did he put vasudev and devaki in the same cell?”

masterji fainted.

Views : 82    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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Munnabhain and circuit

circiut: bhai, who apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla hai aaj raat ko dinner pe.
mera sara chain collection apne kamray mein chupa do na please.



munna bhai: kyun tera dost chor hai kya?

circiut: nahin bhai, woh apne chain pehchan lega.

Views : 213    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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sardar vs pandit

sardar to pandit-ap k sir pe choti q h?
pandit-is se mere dimag me vichar aate h
sardar-sala idhar to pura tata-sky laga h
fir b kuch nhi ata.

Views : 282    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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santa vs banta

banta cigratte pe 2 metre pipe laga kr pe raha tha.
santa : tu pipe laga kar cig q pe raha hai
banta : doctor ne kaha, cig-bidi se dur rehna.

Views : 225    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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girl vs boy

girl- kitna pyar krte ho mujhse?
boy- shahjahan jaisa.
girl- to tajmahal bnwao.
boy- zamin kharid liya hu bs tumhare marne ka intjar kr raha hu......

Views : 254    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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stupid answer

teacher to kg kid: hw many mnths in a year?
kid: 12
teacher: hw did u knw?
kid: baara mahine me bara tarike se tujhko pyar jataunga re!
dhinka chika dhinka chika

Views : 241    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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intelligent netaji

tcher- netaji, apka beta fail ho gaya he aur aap laddu khila rahe he?
netaji- 70 ladko ki class me 60 fail hai, bahumat to mere bete k sath he.

Views : 185    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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boy v/s girl

girl - ur name?
boy- black lion
g -r u joking?
b - no, it means kaalu singh.
and ur's
girl- soft underwear
boy-r u joking?
girl-no it means komal chadda.

Views : 200    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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solid insult

ladki pic upload karke likhti hai : hii friendzz kesi lag rahi hoon..? .
.
.
.
.
. .
boy : tere baap ne 15-20 hazaar ka mobile leke diya hai to ghar me 500 rs. ka
sheesha bhi lagaya hoga.... uss mein dekh le, humse kya poochhti hai 'bhootni' kahi ki....

Views : 192    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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nitesh vs laloo

nitesh: tujhe swimming aati hai?
laaloo: no!
nitesh:tere se kutta acha hai jo swim kar leta hai.
laaloo: tujhe aati hai?
nitesh:haan!
laaloo: fir tere mein aur kutte mein kya farak hai…

Views : 202    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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intelligent son

father: beta ye kaisi machis laaye ho. inme se ek bhi teeli nahi jal
rahi.

funny son: kya baat kartay ho papa sab ki sab check kar kay laya
hoon.

Views : 186    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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boy in kbc

amitab in kbc- pehla sawal 1000ka
whats ur father name?

chikku-life line, phone a frnd

amitabh- kisko lagaye?

chikku-meri maa

chikku(maa se) maa mere pitaji ka kya nam hai?

maa-sawal kitne ka hai

chikku-1000rs ka

maa-quit kar de
1000rs k liye ghar me mahabharat nahi chaiye

Views : 182    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 5 Oct 2015
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great india

chor pakadne ki machine bani.

us-1 din mein 9 chor pakde gaye,

china mein 30,

uk mein 50,aur

india mein
1 hour mein machine hi chori ho gayi.!!

india rocks all are shocks

Views : 107    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 4 Oct 2015
More Pappu Joke

gobar taste

pappu : kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul gobar jaisa swad hai !
papa : hey bhagwan! na jane inhone kya-kya kha ke dekha hua hai.
gobar ka swad bhi pata hai..!“

Views : 380    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 4 Oct 2015
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santa ask banta for his history paper

banta-tera history ka paper kaisa hua ?
santa-’bhout bura’,
saalo ne mere birth se b phale k question puch rakhe the.

Views : 215    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
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santa banta

boss: where were you born?
sardar: india ..
boss: which part?
sardar: what 'which part'? whole body was bon on india.

Views : 160    |    Comments : 0    |    Post Comment Joke Posted on : 3 Oct 2015
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